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Author Topic: How to make hard choices (inspiring TED talk)  (Read 434 times)
ziniztar
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: I chose to end the r/s end of October 2014. He cheated and pushed every button he could to push me away until I had to leave.
Posts: 599



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« on: November 29, 2014, 06:26:26 AM »

Hi guys,

Came across this little gem on TED. Just wanted to give you some inspiration, as it outlines why some choices are so hard because we seem to be comparing unmeasurable things against each other (in this case: values!).

https://www.ted.com/talks/ruth_chang_how_to_make_hard_choices

Seeing this helps me to understand why I was all of a sudden able to break things with dBPDxbf: I realized I valued safety in a relationship more than I did compassion for someone else's situation. I snapped when I found out that he was avoiding me and was just being with me because he knew he had to, or would otherwise loose  me (ironically). I want people to trust me because I can be trusted, and I don't want to have to tell someone to do that. I want a r/s where if someone feels sad, bad, whatever, they come home to me and think " ah, nice, I'm home with you, it's good and safe here". It's what I want and defines me as a person in a relationship.

Good luck with your choices!
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