Wow. She moved on fast. Is that normal?

[WhoahParis]

So... .we went away on a holiday.

Big argument. She became abusive. I felt unsafe.

I left to stay in another hotel for one night.

Big mistake. The very next day (today) she left for Paris to see another guy that she hasn’t seen in eight years.

I am laying here in my hotel room. Literally going crazy.

I feel stupid and used.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[crushedagain]

Even in the context of BPD this doesn't seem "normal" per se. However, I'd venture to guess that "abandoning" her in a strange city as you got your own room was more than enough fuel for her to serve you up with something even more brutal.

[Harri]

Hi.  I am glad you are reaching out for support though I am sorry you need to.

I can't say what she did is normal but you are not alone in your experience of having an SO leave suddenly for another person.  

I feel stupid and used.

I understand but, not to invalidate you, I think you were very smart to remove yourself from a situation where you did not feel safe.  

Is there a history of break-ups in your relationship?

[Red5]

I feel for you Paris,

... .many many times my uBPDw has “picked” a fight while we were hundreds, even thousands of miles away from home on a trip, or vacation... .

There is nowhere to go, no respite... .only the time tested and old reliable tactic of the “silent treatment” is our punishment... .it’s terrible.

Your supposed to be enjoying each other’s company, a “vacation”, fun... .food, and romance... .but no... .she has slipped her rail over who knows what, .and as usual, never saw it coming... .

And now your stuck, .

Many of us have experienced exactly what is happening to you now W-Paris... .

... .BPD’s do seem to enjoy punishing us “nons”.

Hang in there, I guess the best thing for you to do at this point, is try to just make the best of it, see the sights, enjoy the local “fair”... .the “food”.

Take it in, make yourself some good memories in spite of her behaviors.

Keep posting... .

Red5

[Turkish]

 How did she become abusive?  Was this the first time?

[CryWolf]

Hey bud, sorry about the circumstances you're facing. Her leaving to Paris the next day seems to punish you.

How long has the relationship been?
I want to echo Turkish because he asked some key questions to better assist us in helping you.

Has there been any contact between you two since?