I don't know Who I am without her. Enmeshment felt like the purpose of my life...

[Guz]

Divorcing my BPDW has left me feeling like a helpless  child.

Never have I felt this lost before.

She was the first person in the World to make me feel worthy of Love.

And just when I started to love myself - It all went Horribly, Horribly wrong.

I Know that loving oneself comes first. True love for another possibly next. 

It just seems that this time it was the other Way around.

Has Anyone in this Board felt this Way?

And How do you fight this feeling?

[Rose Tiger]

I loved that the Ex loved me.  I would feel self doubt, he would build me up.  I did start feeling good about myself!  Then whammo.

You bring up a good point, how they did make us feel good and start really liking ourselves in the beginning.  That is sort of how we pick up the pieces after these train wrecks.  Treating ourselves like the ex did in th very beginning.  Replacement of ex with positive self talk and unconditional love. 

[dharmagems]

I am sitting in a cafe in this new city I moved into a room today.  I moved to make some fresh start.  I got my final divorce decree the beginning of this month.  I too right now feel so lost and lonely.  What is my true purpose here,  I ask.  I miss leaning on my exhBPD when I'm making decisions and having someone to live for.  I know,  right now it's especially hard especially when all my comforts feel like they've been pulled from under me.  I'm grasping.  Yeah, I'm in he same boat as you.