I've often felt that when my bf is raging that he's talking to or about someone else. The reality is often some part of what he says is about me, but not in totality. He's talking about something or someone in his past or himself. There's always that shred of truth to what he's saying that will at times push my buttons or cause me to feel insecure, but in retrospect... . it's never about me. I could be anybody at that point... . he just has to rage. I'm learning to ignore.
I feel this way too... . Part of their projection... .