Curious if after the split they couldn't wait to leave town

[cal644]

Just wondering - I have met four great guys in my recovery process who all had ex's with BPD - or traits of BPD.  All four of them had their ex's move anywhere from 30 miles to a different state.  The reason I ask too is she has told me she can't wait to get out of the town we live in and my daughter told me she is looking at places 30 miles away.  Seems like 5 for 5 is more than just a coincidence?

[Deleted]

I read somewhere that this a BPD's attempt to start fresh. Some pwBPD, the ones that dissipate like volatile ether and just fall off the face of the earth and are never heard from again, do this because they think a new place, friends, environment, will also give them a FRESH new personality/ way of thinking curing them from BPD. Also this is could also be a tactic to minimize any sort of potential triggers.

It's similiar to a BPD who runs into the arms of another person right after getting out of a relationship. They're putting their hopes of being cured or at least not feel as much pain- onto someone else.

[mango_flower]

Yep - mine moved 3 hours away where a "friend" lived (funnily enough, they're now engaged... . )

She was supposed to be leaving a month after we split  but then decided to throw in her temp job (though she told me they'd gotten rid of her, I don't believe her though, all to convenient) and drove up there the next day.  Like she couldn't wait to get away... . makes me feel like a monster!  Urgh.