What are your BPD's good qualities?

[allibaba]

We all come here to vent and generally its when things are bad... . and its tough to remember why we stay in a relationship with our BPDs (other than an unhealthy addiction to dysfunction) 

But I now recognize the unhealthy parts of me and I am working on them and I still love him and want to be in the relationship.

So I asked myself WHY? this morning.  And here is what I got.

1.  We have 10 yrs of history, through thick and thin we have been there for each other (even when it was dysfunctional).

2.  My husband is probably the most interesting person that I have ever met.  I am NEVER bored.

3.  My husband is incredibly start (intellectually, emotionally)

4.  He is the most amazing father in the world.

5.  My hubby has mad skills around the house (gardening, fixing things, etc, even cooking and cleaning)

6.  I am very attracted to him

7.  Generally speaking (as in when he is not 'out of his mind' we share the same morals and values.

So anyone who wants to join in... . why are you with your BPD and what are their good qualities?

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[downandin]

She's smart.

She's beautiful.

She's the most giving person I've ever met.

She loves her children and would do anything for them.

She loves her family and would do anything for them.

She loves me.

[allibaba]

When was the last time you told her all of that.

I just sent my husband a message listing the reasons why I love being his wife   The same ones that I posted... .

[momtara]

Mine has the same qualities as yours, alibaba, but he doesn't pitch in with the kids.

[Bloomer]

1) He's my twin, in the sense that we share a lot of the same core ideals, lifestyle choices and interests

2) He's incredibly smart

3) He's a talented musician

4) He's very sexy

5) He makes me laugh a lot (more so when there aren't issues or he isn't depressed)

6) He pushes me to achieve my dreams

7) He is good at fixing things, making dinner and eating my baked goods

8) He's good at cuddling

9) He loves our furry child as his own (even though he didn't think he would)

10) He can still make me blush by being sweet to me

[sjm7411]

This is a wonderful idea. 

1) He is SUPER smart, he is the most interesting person to have a conversation with and has the knowledge to talk with anybody about any subject. 

2) I love his grin, it melts me at times. 

3) I never have to ask him to do chores around the house, he's very willing to pitch in.

4) He loves to travel and plan itineraries for vacations like I do.  We've gone to some neat places. 

5) He encourages me to pursue a college degree

6) He gives me a lot of compliments and makes me feel loved, more often than not

7) He loves his daughter and is a good dad to her

8) He can be very romantic and attentive

9) He is creative

10) He never complains about work

[Cloudy Days]

What a great post, it's important to remember why we actually love them. In the bad times it's easy to forget!

He takes care of my garden like a pro and loves nature

He makes me laugh all the time

He is awesome with animals, they are his favorite people... .

He loves music like me and learns how to play my favorite songs

He would give me the world if he could

He acknowledges that he has problems and apologies when he needs to

He gives me his take out leftovers to take for my lunch almost every time

He thanks me for making dinner almost every time even if it's burnt

He does the laundry for me

He lets me put my artwork in every room and encourages me to be creative.

He makes me feel beautiful

Sometimes when he acts like that young happy child, it makes me feel young again, because he's so happy in that moment, it's very contagious.

[allibaba]

Wow they are all really incredible aren't they?

Even with their dysfunctional... . they are exceptional people. 

[connect]

Good thread!

Mine:

He is intellectually stimulating

He is the sexiest man I have met

He is generous

He is kind

He makes me laugh my head off

He makes me feel beautiful

He wants to know everything about me

He shows his vulnerability

He is a unique character

[Highlander]

He's funny, talented, spunky and smart but most of all he is sensitive.

Although, at times, his sensitivities can be his demons, they are also the driving mechanism that makes him so passionate and loving towards myself and our family (2 doggie kids).