was this a manipulation tactic or what?

[Beware of Junk Psychology...]

so after my ex, i told myself i wouldnt see or get involved with any girls who werent over there ex or had baggage right off the bat...

i was pondering over things, and i remember during each recycle or each time she came to me after a break up with someone else, she would say always say she wasn't ready for anything physical and would ask me not to try anything... .and i wouldnt, but then she would always get things started and we'd sleep together, and she'd say she likes when it happens naturally like that and she's not pressured... .

i dont understand that and wondering what was behind it... .i've never had to deal with those types of rules or anything with other girls, i just wonder if it's common, or if it was her trying to use sex as a manipulation ploy?

i would always get annoyed about it and tell her it was just annoying to hear that stuff... .like i dont mind if i girl told me to stop before things got to heated, but to hear it the day before we're supposed to hang out... .it just annoys me... .is that my issue and am i insensitive or something?

i guess in my ex's case i also saw it as, sure i'm the one who doesnt get any action meanwhile you'll sleep with your ex no problem, or something like that... .i dont know

[fakename]

so after my ex, i told myself i wouldnt see or get involved with any girls who werent over there ex or had baggage right off the bat...

i was pondering over things, and i remember during each recycle or each time she came to me after a break up with someone else, she would say always say she wasn't ready for anything physical and would ask me not to try anything... .and i wouldnt, but then she would always get things started and we'd sleep together, and she'd say she likes when it happens naturally like that and she's not pressured... .

i dont understand that and wondering what was behind it... .i've never had to deal with those types of rules or anything with other girls, i just wonder if it's common, or if it was her trying to use sex as a manipulation ploy?

i would always get annoyed about it and tell her it was just annoying to hear that stuff... .like i dont mind if i girl told me to stop before things got to heated, but to hear it the day before we're supposed to hang out... .it just annoys me... .is that my issue and am i insensitive or something?

i guess in my ex's case i also saw it as, sure i'm the one who doesnt get any action meanwhile you'll sleep with your ex no problem, or something like that... .i dont know

[Justadude]

She just wanted to use you to cry on and boost her ego. She played you. She didn't want you to make the move for sex, she wanted it, and she wanted to be in control, when she wanted it or when she was ready. She's playing head games with herself.

[Clearmind]

Two different people, two different boundaries and two different ways of seeing it – and neither party understand the other.

A partner of a Borderline in my opinion is always a rebound. Everyone they date is a rebound because they never truly move on from the last.

So if we really want a healthy relationship with healthy boundaries, including those around sex don’t date a Borderline.