My parting gift to her.

[free-n-clear]

    Ran into uBPDxgf at the local on NYE afternoon. Both of us sociable & friendly, peck on the cheek, bit of chitchat, with no talk of 'us' or the past. Mingling (separately), neither of us focussed on the other, just both in the same crowd. So far, so good.

    A bit later on, I go back to the bar for a beer and another barmaid, out of habit, pours mine and opens a 'stubby' for her. (I'd been buying her drinks for two years, and the staff get to know you, you know?)  What the hell, I think, it's New Years Eve, so I give her the stubby. Happy New Year! No harm done, methinks.

    Should've known it would trigger her.

    She started raging at me about $20 she claimed I owe her! This from someone I'd been supporting financially not only throughout the entire r/s, but even - to a lesser degree - through the subsequent, short-lived 'friendship'.

     Fv<k this, methinks, having managed to put some distance between us while others were telling her to pull her head in. I took out my phone. It contained a draft message I'd written some weeks earlier when I was in a rather dark mood.

     Long story short, she now knows that the reason she's most comfortable fv<king guys that don't care about her, suffers from low self-esteem, depression and mood swings, has outbursts of unprovoked rage, is a compulsive liar and (as she has admitted) pushes away the people she loves the most is due to a lovely little thing called Borderline Personality Disorder.

     Then the Fireworks really began and she was asked to leave! A Happy New Year, indeed!    

[goldylamont]

wow. um. wow. i'd love to hear how this whole experience pans out for you freenclear. all of us here try to stop ourselves from participating in negative ways, but damn everybody's got a breaking point. i'm laughing my ass off that she was asked to leave, such a good ending! how are you feeling after all of this?

[free-n-clear]

how are you feeling after all of this?

Just like my username suggests! Haven't heard from her since, which is no problem at all.

[goldylamont]

oh man that is so awesome 

[free-n-clear]

all of us here try to stop ourselves from participating in negative ways, but damn everybody's got a breaking point.

  Absolutely. She'd raged at me in public many times before, especially at that pub, but this was the first time she'd done it there since I'd split up with her. Everybody there knew the deal, which was why several of them were quick to tell her to pull her head in. I just wanted a circuit breaker that would put an end to it once and for all, and I remembered the draft text... .

[nolisan]

That made me laugh. Man I had so many draft messages that I didn't send. I alway wait over-noght before sending "tough" messages but with her I would always chicken out (I might lose her). Wish I had sent one of them early on and shut it down. My gut was telling me to do that but my heart was hooked.

[free-n-clear]

That made me laugh. Man I had so many draft messages that I didn't send. I always wait over-night before sending "tough" messages but with her I would always chicken out (I might lose her). Wish I had sent one of them early on and shut it down. My gut was telling me to do that but my heart was hooked.

Wonder how common that is? During the r/s I did send the occasional "tough love" message, as what I was saying was more likely to get through to her in text, where she could re-read it while she fumed about it, than if I tried to talk to her, where she would trigger and just rage at me.