i stood up for myself

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

And it feels really good.

Been doing LC for a while.  My exBPDgf has been stringing me along and recently she told me about her sexual promiscuity since our breakup to really hurt me and how she wants me back after it all.

Then when I didn't denounce the idea she rescinded the idea of wanting me back. 

Then tonight she tells me she wants me back again, and wants me to fly out to see her, she's had a change of heart.  I say ok. That turned into, I want you to take me on a vacation to Hawaii. I said no. She became irate telling me if you loved me and wanted to work out you would take me.  I said listen to yourself, no.  She argued and got angrier for 15 minutes. "No" I kept saying it.  End result she who has been initiating all contact says "well the leave me the f alone, why do you keep bothering me" and hangs up.

Then she texts me "I wish that guy got me pregnant, I would marry him, at least that would give you a reason to stay the f away from me"

No joke, I was trying to do NC, which became LC because she got so m ad when I told her I couldn't talk to her anymore.

Felt great to say no.  Especially to see that side of her, makes it so much easier when I see the full blown crazy. But now these texts are scaring me I have read stories about this stuff but never thought she was as bad.  Now I'm scared of the "smear" which I thought was beyond her,now I'm not so sure.

[Vexed]

And it feels really good.

Been doing LC for a while.  My exBPDgf has been stringing me along and recently she told me about her sexual promiscuity since our breakup to really hurt me and how she wants me back after it all.

Then when I didn't denounce the idea she rescinded the idea of wanting me back. 

Then tonight she tells me she wants me back again, and wants me to fly out to see her, she's had a change of heart.  I say ok. That turned into, I want you to take me on a vacation to Hawaii. I said no. She became irate telling me if you loved me and wanted to work out you would take me.  I said listen to yourself, no.  She argued and got angrier for 15 minutes. "No" I kept saying it.  End result she who has been initiating all contact says "well the leave me the f alone, why do you keep bothering me" and hangs up.

Then she texts me "I wish that guy got me pregnant, I would marry him, at least that would give you a reason to stay the f away from me"

No joke, I was trying to do NC, which became LC because she got so m ad when I told her I couldn't talk to her anymore.

Felt great to say no.  Especially to see that side of her, makes it so much easier when I see the full blown crazy. But now these texts are scaring me I have read stories about this stuff but never thought she was as bad.  Now I'm scared of the "smear" which I thought was beyond her,now I'm not so sure.

[Trent]

Good job on standing up for yourself!  I remember how, after a while, I would be hesitant to speak up, as it was often easier to let things slide than to deal with my ex's rages.  I guess that's part of how they break us down   

I was trying to do NC, which became LC because she got so m ad when I told her I couldn't talk to her anymore.

If I read this right, it sounds like you set a boundary, she had a tantrum, and then you weakened your boundary in response to her tantrum.  What kind of precedent do you think you have set here, and how might that play out in the future?  IMO, if you set a hard boundary of NC, your BPD ex will probably want to break it down.  It's up to you to enforce that boundary.  If you're truly done with this r/s, go full NC to create space for healing and moving forward.   

[AwakenedOne]

"I wish that guy got me pregnant, I would marry him, at least that would give you a reason to stay the f away from me"

Good job standing up to her. What she said to you is really disgusting. My advice to you is to now remember all of her words, not just the words she will tell you on her next phone call to you. You might want to write that nasty remark down and have it close to the phone to prevent you from answering any calls from her.

[Vexed]

"I wish that guy got me pregnant, I would marry him, at least that would give you a reason to stay the f away from me"

Good job standing up to her. What she said to you is really disgusting. My advice to you is to now remember all of her words, not just the words she will tell you on her next phone call to you. You might want to write that nasty remark down and have it close to the phone to prevent you from answering any calls from her.

Thanks.  The remark is seared into my head I won't forget it.

There is a marked difference how I feel ending the rs with some dignity by saying no, and also seeing such a demonic side from her.  I don't know that I have the upper hand, but having even the slightest victory and taking back a bit of control will help me move forward much faster I think.  So I realize NC will be very important to not give up what I gained from that interaction.

[Infared]

Go full-on NC. Come here for support. We will cheer you on.

She is Full-On abusing you. I have been through it ... .It's an ugly dance and I was the one suffering.

From what you just wrote above... .GOOD RIDDANCE!... .but when "I" was unhealthy the beast (the disorder), would treat me like that and I would still give it power. No more.