Time to see if I'm strong enough

[Artimer]

As the title says, time to see if I'm strong enough or not. Since her wanting to be friends, she's been in contact more and more, and then something happened earlier this week to her car and she turned to me for help.

She's due to come over today for me to fix the car. She's also been talking to me about her depression & other medical issues she's been having. It's strange how I can see the behavior so clearly now, and thus far I've managed to not get tangled in the web.

Just hope I can stay strong when I see her in person.

[Ventus2ct]

Good luck! You're a braver man than me, hope for your sake you can stay strong. I wouldn't even dream of putting myself in that position, a bit like a heroin addict asking to see a fully loaded up needle!

Sorry for my negativity. Hope it goes ok for you.

[Artimer]

Good luck! You're a braver man than me, hope for your sake you can stay strong. I wouldn't even dream of putting myself in that position, a bit like a heroin addict asking to see a fully loaded up needle!

Sorry for my negativity. Hope it goes ok for you.

Maybe, but I don't feel anything. Complete indifference.

[Mr Hollande]

Good luck! You're a braver man than me, hope for your sake you can stay strong. I wouldn't even dream of putting myself in that position, a bit like a heroin addict asking to see a fully loaded up needle!

Sorry for my negativity. Hope it goes ok for you.

Maybe, but I don't feel anything. Complete indifference.

Wish I was there. I envy you.

[Artimer]

And as expected. Didn't turn up & not so much as an apology 

Thanks to this site & the advice from people off here, I am fortunate enough to see through all the facades & lies 

[seeking balance]

And as expected. Didn't turn up & not so much as an apology 

If another friend did this behavior, how would you feel and would you put yourself out there again?

[Artimer]

And as expected. Didn't turn up & not so much as an apology 

If another friend did this behavior, how would you feel and would you put yourself out there again?

The answer is short & sweet. No. I wouldn't allow this behavior, hence why there won't be any more contact.

Expect nothing & you suffer the pain of disappointment.

[seeking balance]

Expect nothing & you suffer the pain of disappointment.

 

[Artimer]

Expect nothing & you suffer the pain of disappointment.

 

Hahaha, that's a typo - meant to say expect nothing and you don't suffer the pain of dissapointment 

[seeking balance]

Expect nothing & you suffer the pain of disappointment.

 

Hahaha, that's a typo - meant to say expect nothing and you don't suffer the pain of dissapointment 

funny, I read it how you meant it

[BacknthSaddle]

Experiences like this were helpful for me in breaking free of the "friend" thing too, although I've only recently really committed to breaking free.  Not long ago, I was talking with my ex and said I was looking for vegetarian recipes for a cookout.  I also knew that her roommate designed these cool bracelets and wanted one for my niece.  I asked her if she had recipes and told her about the bracelet.  She said, no problem, I'll tell (roommate) tonight and email you recipes in the morning. Suffice it to say, roommate was never told and recipes were never emailed.  Two days later texted me asking for a favor (and an unreasonable one at that).  I didn't even bother bringing it all up. 

As seeking balance suggests: hard to view this person as a "friend." 

[Artimer]

Experiences like this were helpful for me in breaking free of the "friend" thing too, although I've only recently really committed to breaking free.  Not long ago, I was talking with my ex and said I was looking for vegetarian recipes for a cookout.  I also knew that her roommate designed these cool bracelets and wanted one for my niece.  I asked her if she had recipes and told her about the bracelet.  She said, no problem, I'll tell (roommate) tonight and email you recipes in the morning. Suffice it to say, roommate was never told and recipes were never emailed.  Two days later texted me asking for a favor (and an unreasonable one at that).  I didn't even bother bringing it all up. 

As seeking balance suggests: hard to view this person as a "friend." 

I hear you. I got a text late Friday asking if I was available yesterday afternoon. Ummmm, no, I have a life and don't sit and wait around for "friends" who don't even bother to apologise for not letting me know that they aren't able to make it.

I said I'd be back today and if she needed help fitting the part then I'd still be available. She wanted me to leave the part out for her to collect. A bit later, asked me if I could help fit it and also look at the new computer I had given her previously. Suffice to say, didn't turn up or respond to my text stating that I'm at home again.

Just left a text saying the part is in my garage and left it at that. If there was any lingering doubt that she was not suffering from BPD/NPD, it is now gone. And I'm happy to say that I'm not even hurt or angry at her actions.

[Mr Hollande]

Artimer, reading your comments in this post is an inspiration! With that I'll embark for my regular evening yomp.