Four months and another email. Others thoughts please?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

My ex-girlfriend who I believe has BPD at least is still emailing me, I know I was very good to her, she had a roundhouse and I stayed with her 7/14 days for 2 1/2 years taking care of the house, working on it and keeping it stalked with food as well as taking care of the animals!  I could not take her cheating and lying any more so I was done, not to mention her eccentric abuses of me! I believe I mentioned before we were friends for seven and a have years before we got together and we were together 2 1/2 years, she has never known anybody that one that stayed in her life and I clearly see why, could I have others thoughts on this email please after 4 months when I fully believe I was immediately replaced!  I caught her on dating sites all the time, I would like to add that the previous emails from her that I ignore are all of a accusatory nature saying that " people" and "everybody" sees me out drinking in bars with ___s whenever they go out!  The truth is since I broke up with her I really have not left the house and just spend time with my family and a few friends at the house as well as take care of my children and try to financially recover from a relationship that totally drained me!

Your thoughts about this email please?



I never wanted to get back with you after I knew you were with ___s. I just wanted to say goodbye like adults since we were friends for so long, by the way you are emailing and texting... .I can tell you are going downhill fast with the wrong crowd... Sad but true.  Someday you will wake up and get it, or not.

[Targeted]

My ex-girlfriend who I believe has BPD at least is still emailing me, I know I was very good to her, she had a roundhouse and I stayed with her 7/14 days for 2 1/2 years taking care of the house, working on it and keeping it stalked with food as well as taking care of the animals!  I could not take her cheating and lying any more so I was done, not to mention her eccentric abuses of me! I believe I mentioned before we were friends for seven and a have years before we got together and we were together 2 1/2 years, she has never known anybody that one that stayed in her life and I clearly see why, could I have others thoughts on this email please after 4 months when I fully believe I was immediately replaced!  I caught her on dating sites all the time, I would like to add that the previous emails from her that I ignore are all of a accusatory nature saying that " people" and "everybody" sees me out drinking in bars with ___s whenever they go out!  The truth is since I broke up with her I really have not left the house and just spend time with my family and a few friends at the house as well as take care of my children and try to financially recover from a relationship that totally drained me!

Your thoughts about this email please?



I never wanted to get back with you after I knew you were with ___s. I just wanted to say goodbye like adults since we were friends for so long, by the way you are emailing and texting... .I can tell you are going downhill fast with the wrong crowd... Sad but true.  Someday you will wake up and get it, or not.

[Swiggle]

IMO I think it is projection, I think she is saying

I want to get back with you but I can't stop cheating and looking for other people. I want you to talk to me. I'm going downhill fast, I hang with the wrong people and you were good to me. I will never wake up.

[Targeted]

That sounds like a good interpretation to me and mostly correct knowing her and her actions, I would like to see her get help and start to straighten herself out because I do care about her but IM at a standpoint with this where I am not willing to do anything with her other then possibly helping a therapist make a proper diagnosis, even with that it would take years to Level her out because she is 51 and this has Ben entrenched in her for a long time.

If you were to bother answering an email like this what would you say having my standpoint?

My only other option is to ignore it like I have in the past which I don't mind doing because I have made up my mind to not re-enter a abusive situatio!

Ps. I just got another email that says

Please don't have your ___s text me.

[Swiggle]

The unhealthy me would respond with I'm sorry, I wish I could help you, those things aren't true, let me bend, twist and defend myself to try and make you believe.

The healtheir me woudn't respond at all. If I needed to get it out I would type and send to a friend, post it here or put it away to read later.

Sometimes we are so quick to take care of the people we love at our own expense. Take care of you and try to ingore her, if it keeps up you may need to be more aggressive like blocking her email, phone number and/or doing something legally. She can't be fixed, as much as we want to believe we can fix them we can't 

[Swiggle]

Oh yeah and the new email... .she's excalating since you are ignoring her. If I had to guess you are the kind of person who wouldn't want anyone thinking those things about you... .that you would associate with ___s. So she is taking something personal that she knows might be a hot button for you and using it to bait you. Don't bite, that is what she wants.

[Targeted]

Thank you for responding Swiggle,

like I said I do wish she would get help but my desire to be a " rescuer " on this one is not there anymore, that does not mean that I do not still care about her or a love her and I am proud of myself for that, but I also came to terms with the fact that unless she fixes herself all I will get is abuse and I don't want that, I do have A general caring nature for other people so there is a small part of me that hopes she wakes up someday. So I am perfectly fine with the facts as they are, no commitment to therapy= No ME!