My birthday...

[Depression = 72% of members]

Ha. Yes. the thread below reminded me to ask for opinions.  

My birthday is coming up in a couple of days. Although I have my doubts that I will hear anything from her (she's a bridge burner,) I want to be prepared and maybe use the opportunity.

The point being... .I have made leaps in my healing. I don't care if I will ever talk to her again (actually I prefer not much more,) but with my birthday coming up I thought about the "what if."

Not reacting at all is definitely an option I would have no problem with.

But since I feel better than ever (actually even better than before the relationship with her - probably one reason I fell for the fantasy) I thought I might use the occasion of her maybe texting me.

I wanted to just use this as an opportunity to draw a line under this chapter, a part of my healing. Maybe also a bit for her, who knows. Maybe some day she will do better, and it might make this part of her life a less bad of a memory. But that's not really the point.

I know her well enough to know that if she will text me (definitely no call) it will be a ver simple "happy birthday."

I wanted to send her back something I have "planned" in advance. I want it to sound detached, but civil and warm. It would be awesome if you could check it for potential tripwires I am missing.

Her immediate reaction to it... .I don't care. If I get only one nasty or somehow inapropriate text from her... .she's blocked immediately.

How about:

"Thank you! Hope you are doing well. Know that I hold no grudge against you and that I wish you the very best for your future. You'll always have a special place in my memory. Take care. X"

[thatwasthat]

Ha. Yes. the thread below reminded me to ask for opinions.  

My birthday is coming up in a couple of days. Although I have my doubts that I will hear anything from her (she's a bridge burner,) I want to be prepared and maybe use the opportunity.

The point being... .I have made leaps in my healing. I don't care if I will ever talk to her again (actually I prefer not much more,) but with my birthday coming up I thought about the "what if."

Not reacting at all is definitely an option I would have no problem with.

But since I feel better than ever (actually even better than before the relationship with her - probably one reason I fell for the fantasy) I thought I might use the occasion of her maybe texting me.

I wanted to just use this as an opportunity to draw a line under this chapter, a part of my healing. Maybe also a bit for her, who knows. Maybe some day she will do better, and it might make this part of her life a less bad of a memory. But that's not really the point.

I know her well enough to know that if she will text me (definitely no call) it will be a ver simple "happy birthday."

I wanted to send her back something I have "planned" in advance. I want it to sound detached, but civil and warm. It would be awesome if you could check it for potential tripwires I am missing.

Her immediate reaction to it... .I don't care. If I get only one nasty or somehow inapropriate text from her... .she's blocked immediately.

How about:

"Thank you! Hope you are doing well. Know that I hold no grudge against you and that I wish you the very best for your future. You'll always have a special place in my memory. Take care. X"

[12dazednconfused21]

Hi thatwasthat,

I think you are feeling good, but still have a lot of anger repressed, I wonder why you want to keep playing mind games? I think the only outcome is a temporary satisfaction that will become guilt! if you do or write whatever so "no compassionate", the most probable result is that you are hurting her after all, right? and I guess you know what happens when you hurt them (real or not). So why you want to deal with 2 issues on your birthday? 1) the blame/guilt for potentially hurt her while saying god bye, and 2) her retaliation!

I think if you want to really sound detached the only sound you need to do is the one you do when you do or say nothing. My friend I am in trouble too!  and I just want to leave all that s**t behind. my advice... .give you the best happy birthday present of your life... .freedom  ! 

[Deeno02]

Ha. Yes. the thread below reminded me to ask for opinions.  

My birthday is coming up in a couple of days. Although I have my doubts that I will hear anything from her (she's a bridge burner,) I want to be prepared and maybe use the opportunity.

The point being... .I have made leaps in my healing. I don't care if I will ever talk to her again (actually I prefer not much more,) but with my birthday coming up I thought about the "what if."

Not reacting at all is definitely an option I would have no problem with.

But since I feel better than ever (actually even better than before the relationship with her - probably one reason I fell for the fantasy) I thought I might use the occasion of her maybe texting me.

I wanted to just use this as an opportunity to draw a line under this chapter, a part of my healing. Maybe also a bit for her, who knows. Maybe some day she will do better, and it might make this part of her life a less bad of a memory. But that's not really the point.

I know her well enough to know that if she will text me (definitely no call) it will be a ver simple "happy birthday."

I wanted to send her back something I have "planned" in advance. I want it to sound detached, but civil and warm. It would be awesome if you could check it for potential tripwires I am missing.

Her immediate reaction to it... .I don't care. If I get only one nasty or somehow inapropriate text from her... .she's blocked immediately.

How about:

"Thank you! Hope you are doing well. Know that I hold no grudge against you and that I wish you the very best for your future. You'll always have a special place in my memory. Take care. X"

Her birthday came before mine (same month). I didnt say a word and it came and went. Then my birthday came and went, not a word. Win-win. She was occupied anyway with the replacement, but I was definetly worried she would have said something snarky, but didnt. Whew... .