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Author Topic: Feeling guilty for taking distance  (Read 470 times)
Mie
***
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic Partner
Relationship status: Living together since Dec 2004
Posts: 120


« on: November 27, 2014, 03:34:58 PM »

My pwBPD is going through difficult times, which means major dysregulation. Meanwhile I am burdened with running (our!) business and financial disaster. He is either in the bedroom watching whatever or drinking and raging all over the house. 2-3 days a week he is sober, active and sociable and taking care of business. And still explosive any moment.

So I bury myself in work, and if I'm not working I'm on my own. I pay attention to him and ask if he wants a cup of tea, which he appreciates, but does not move from his screen. I don't avoid him but I take distance being busy elsewhere. I feel guilty for it, but I think I shouldn't.

Tomorrow I'm going to meet a friend, we're going to make a good walk and a nice meal and just talk. I'm going to spent an entire evening with a sane person!  Smiling (click to insert in post)

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This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

foggydew
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Relationship status: widowed/7 years
Posts: 371



« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2014, 04:15:53 PM »

Well done, you! I think you are doing exactly the right thing. Even in 'normal' relationships it's good to have time out and look after yourself. And he is getting space to sort himself out too. Good luck!
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