I didn't cave in today

[Moselle]

It was a mutual agreement to separate.  Initially I was going to prepare the way for her and the kids to follow. Then I think the abandonment fear kicked in and she went bezerk with me travelling back 1500 km each weekend.

At that stage I was just as volatile as her and had no idea about BPD.  I separated. And came back as.often as possible for the children. My bpdfamily journey of discovery began.

I put in boundaries and she raged for 6 months against them.

I had a radical acceptance moment and I accepted her illness as just that.

That prompted an honest moment from her where she admitted to having Borderline and Narcissistic traits. This is in addition to the eating, impulse control, obsessive and General Anxiety disorders which her psychiatrist has told me about. The fist two I have in a written diagnosis. Obsessive and GAD she told me about over the phone.  And W told me about BP and NP.  

We had 3 months of solid improvement. And I moved home without a job without anything. Then she went on a silent treat mentioned bender for a month. I have just started a new job and really need to focus on that.

I think she's serious this time ff.  She has the services ( sponsored by her mother I think) of a very high end celebrity lawyer. She has stolen my personal laptop. ( I think to look for evidence of money?, other women, I don't know what) She has figured out what earn I my new job. (I didn't tell her for obvious reasons)

I am not prepared.  I was last year and even had lawyers speaking to eachother at one stage. She fired that lawyer ( who was reasonable and had the children's interest at heart). She has a new one specialising in matriarchal rights in a divorce.

My W is very very high functioning. And she is very very convincing.  I thought this MC was fair. Yesterday W turned on the onslaught tears, wailing, rage, and the MC turned. I guess we all want to believe the crying, self proclaimed, victim. And if someone cries like that, someone must be responsible right? - only one person to blame - Moselle.

I have faith that good will overcome.  

I'll phone my lawyer today and figure out what to do on monday. I'm tired ff. I've said to her if she's not with me she needs to go. I guess we'll find out her choice on monday , and I'll deal with the fallout.  If she goes for a fight I will give her the fight of my life - for my children.  She's managed to isolate me over the years, but she has not bargained on a Moselle with his back against the wall. I have no wa but forward,  and if she refuses to respect my boundaries, perhaps it's better that she does go.  

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Moselle]

A neutral sunday. I'm not sure what she's going to do tomorrow. She's calmed right down, but still being a control freak.  I think divorce is too much trouble for her. And it doesn't suit her image.  I may be mistaken but I think she's backed off.  I'll be arriving home at school home time  though,  just in case she plans packing them all away tomorrow.

[EaglesJuju]

This thread has reached its post limit, and is now closed. This is a worthwhile topic, and you are free to start a new thread to continue the conversation. Thanks for your understanding... .