So she called me last Saturday...

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I would prefer not to hear from her so often. Nor do I really want to spend much time with her. I care but I like caring from afar at this point.

Backing away with a little Controlled Contact may be helpful. Keep your conversations boring. If you talk say on Tuesday, let her know you can talk again on Thursday, stick to that. Then slowly draw the time you are available to talk out a day or two at a time. Next time, past Thursday, maybe the next Tuesday. You get the gist.

This is your life paperlung, you get to choose who you spend your time with.

Thanks. I'll keep that in mind

[paperlung]

I would prefer not to hear from her so often. Nor do I really want to spend much time with her. I care but I like caring from afar at this point.

Backing away with a little Controlled Contact may be helpful. Keep your conversations boring. If you talk say on Tuesday, let her know you can talk again on Thursday, stick to that. Then slowly draw the time you are available to talk out a day or two at a time. Next time, past Thursday, maybe the next Tuesday. You get the gist.

This is your life paperlung, you get to choose who you spend your time with.

Thanks. I'll keep that in mind

[jhkbuzz]

The way I see it, I have two options: NC or LC. She has texted me every day since last Saturday. Today she sent me a picture of herself taken by someone else in front of the mall. She was wearing a backwards hat (probably belongs to whoever took the picture) and titled it "Swag". I never replied. I don't get it. She's been complaining to me how she has no friends but yet she's out at the mall with someone. Doesn't make sense to me. All this small talk doesn't sit well with me either.

Sounds you are doubting her assessment of her life ("no friends".  Is she lying?

It also sounds like you need to think about your boundaries since she doesn't have any.

I honestly don't know. Maybe she painted them black when she contacted me but now one or two of them are white again. I highly doubt I was the only person she contacted. Just look what she texted me on Monday:

"Im not gonna lie im a trainwreck right now. Im abusing my clonazepam and all sorts of crap. Not sleeping. Not really eating. Mixed up with the people from my past. I havent done any of the assignments the nurse told me to do. I just dont know. Im rendering 3 videos for work right now and i plan to take another pill after this."

There is nothing special about me. Anyone will do to soothe her.

What do you mean about the boundaries?

Pretty much what Suzn said - it's your life, you get to choose who you want to spend time with and energy on.  If you don't like the constant, random texts, you have to draw some boundaries.  :)on't respond right away, respond a few days later, etc. Decide what level of contact you're comfortable with and stick to it - no matter what she does.

[Suzn]

Just to be clear, Controlled Contact is a compassionate way to back away. It helps both of you with abandonment fears/issues. We all have them to a certain degree.

NC is only a tool until you have a better footing emotionally. It's not for punishment.

[paperlung]

I don't know who or what she thinks I am to her. Not long ago she sends me this meme titled "when you thought you lost him because you were acting crazy but then he messages you" and it had two pictures of Rihanna; one of her crying and one her looking happy.

I do not need to be sent this stuff from an ex-girlfriend who treated me like complete crap towards the end of our relationship.

It all makes sense to me now. Whoever she was dating probably broke up with her because she was acting crazy and that sent her off the deep end. Feeling lonely, she reaches out to me. She's done this exact same thing before. I only exist to fill a void.

Knowing this, I got mad and took a jab at her saying, "Haha. Not me, I knew when to call it quits!" And then she, "After like a year or something." I then said, "Should've been a lot sooner ." Then she told me to "get f***ed". If that got her mad at me, I won't mind.

I need to find a way out of this with her. First, I need her to pay me back. She gets paid on the 16th so hopefully that will be settled then. I also need to worry about getting my video game system back from her that I brought over the night I saw her.