Jealousy - probably isn't what it is.

[Depression = 72% of members]

Wife was briefly agitated last night because I had told a female co-worker in the adjacent cube that I went to a urologist for urinary pain.  Purpose of telling the co-worker was mainly to let her know where I was going in the middle of a work day.

Wife says, "I feel upset that you are telling random women intimate details about your private parts."   

I just tried to stay out of the conversation (avoid JADE), keep answers short.  I felt like she was trying to bait me into something.

I think what is really going on is that she's worried about my health, and rather than admit that, wants to be angry at me because she doesn't have answers as to what is wrong with me (she's out of the loop).  Add other stress and worry in her life right now, and I think her natural outlet is to find an external source (me) for the cause of her stress.

[maxsterling]

Wife was briefly agitated last night because I had told a female co-worker in the adjacent cube that I went to a urologist for urinary pain.  Purpose of telling the co-worker was mainly to let her know where I was going in the middle of a work day.

Wife says, "I feel upset that you are telling random women intimate details about your private parts."   

I just tried to stay out of the conversation (avoid JADE), keep answers short.  I felt like she was trying to bait me into something.

I think what is really going on is that she's worried about my health, and rather than admit that, wants to be angry at me because she doesn't have answers as to what is wrong with me (she's out of the loop).  Add other stress and worry in her life right now, and I think her natural outlet is to find an external source (me) for the cause of her stress.

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[Lifewriter16]

Hi maxsterling,

I think I would have felt the same if I were in your wife's position. It seems like too much detail for the nature of the supposed relationship. I would have simply expected you to say that you were going for a medical appointment. That you said more would have made me question whether something else was going on.

I hope you don't mind me giving you this feedback.

Love Lifewriter

[formflier]

 

Max,

I tend to be pretty open about medical stuff.  I could see myself saying something like this and not thinking a thing of it.

Hope the appointment went well... .

FF

[Cloudy Days]

I can actually see your wife's side of things but I wouldn't have gotten angry about it, just would have said it was TMI. I wouldn't tell someone I was going to a GYNO for such and such, it's just TMI and really it puts a picture in your head of what is going on at the doctors visit I guess. Simply saying, I'm going to the doctor would have sufficed.

[Notwendy]

There is also a discussion on workplace discussions on another thread. I think we take extra precautions about sharing information and certain discussions in the workplace.

I don't think this was a "wrong" discussion but it is TMI to talk about your private parts. My feedback to you as a female is that, if my co-worker said this to me, I wouldn't want to know about it. However, if my colleague said he was "going to the doctor" for a check up, or for allergies, or a flu shot, I wouldn't think twice of it.

In general, in the workplace, saying one is "going to the doctor" is OK.