Hello, Kayleigh2188 &
I'm so sorry that you are having to go through all of this stress, but very happy that you've found us! There are many parents having to deal with a BPD Significant Other, and I hope that they will hop in and give you their insights and advice, based on their own experiences. We do want to help
One thing I tried to do with my own (now grown up) children, was to model for them a good, steady emotional demeanor in order to balance out their Dad's BPD-type behaviors. I did provide a calm, rational and warm presence, and I do believe it helped them a lot in their growing up. I didn't know about BPD in those days (a long time ago!), but I
did know that they needed my example to follow and count on.
I think that finding this site, reading the threads, and checking out the links to the right-hand side of this page (and all the Articles and Workshops you can find), will help you with this issue... .I'm so glad you're here, Kayleigh2188!