However, in my experience, my ex reminiscences not only impulsively. He sometimes does it when he wants to manipulate. For instance, he writes something to someone - me or another female- and doesn't get an immediate response. He gets anxious and starts sending more emotional stuff mentioning good memories. You respond. He disappears. (I liken this to getting a fix).
I am really struggling with this right now.
In the last couple of days, he will do the whole say and say and say again until he gets the response he wants. If he doesn't get the response he wants, then he gets huffy and says, "I was just trying to be nice." It is infuriating because it feels like I can't even say something as simple as, "I don't want pizza." without it getting turned into something weird.
Him: If I get a supreme pizza, will you help me eat it.
Me: No. I don't want pizza.
Him: Why not? Are you not in the mood for pizza or something?
Me: I don't want pizza. I will worry about what I am going to eat when I get home from work.
Him: I was just trying to be nice.
(I rarely want pizza as it gives me horrible indigestion and sets off other stomach issues. This isn't something new.)
Fast forward a bit... .he starts texting me at work:
Him: I've got a hankering for fried chicken. You?
Me: Talk to the kids.
Him: They still want pizza. I could get them a pizza and chicken for us.
Me: Focus on you and the kids. I told you before I left that I would eat when I got home. Stop messing with me.
Him: Sorry, I'll figure out a way to get the kids what they want and me what I want.
Me: Good boy
He wouldn't stop. Before I left for work, he was going on and on about how much he wanted to eat pizza and watch the super bowl. Magically, in a matter of a couple of hours, he changes his mind and suddenly gets a hankering for chicken and is trying to get me to engage in a conversation with him. Saying "Good boy" was very mean. At the same time, it got him to stop texting me at work. The funniest thing of all is that it seems like he suddenly remembered that I like chicken and get got a hankering for it. I feel like it was a manipulative ploy to get me to engage and give him some kind of praise and/or attention.
I wanted to cut my toenails and he had the toenail clippers. He got them and then proceeded to sit down and ask for me feet. I said no and he said, "But you used to love it when I cut your toenails."
Um, this is friggin' crazy making for me. If I give no response, he nags until he gets a response. Any response or non-response I give seems to be impossible for me. It seems like nothing I do will get him to go away. I won't give him a fix. If I were to lose my cool and engage and fight with him, he might go away for a little while. I have to stay focused on how I feel and how much I want to be done and over with him. If I am not careful, I will start feeling sorry for him and get sucked right back into his selfish and delusional world.
