Hopefully a positive note for anyone currently going through the split...

[Depression = 72% of members]

So, not quite a month after my ex finally moved out after months of turmoil, lies, cheating and effectively not really being in a relationship, I just wanted to share some positive vibes with anyone who may find themselves in a real hard place right now dealing with a split with someone suffering with BPD or BPD traits... .

I hit rock bottom, to the point I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, dreaded the weekends, the morning and generally being around people... .but like a boxer who had taken so many blows he should be finished, I thought no, I'm getting myself up and I will win the next round... .

So, I started slow, going on Tinder of all things... .not looking for anything, more just to reassure myself that I was a "normal" bloke who could eventually meet someone new in the future, not that I felt ready for it.

Well, about 3 weeks ago I started chatting to a girl who like me has a child, and we quickly hit it off and it became apparent we were on the same wavelength. We've only met briefly, but it is so refreshing to chat to someone in a mature manner, share a mutual respect of each other and understand each other. I would actually say, I have had more meaningful conversation with this girl in the 3 weeks I've known her than I did in 4 years of being with my ex udBPDgf.

I've got my motivation back, I've got back in the gym, getting my fitness going and I feel like I have escaped the shackles of BPD and am running free (no Iron Maiden pun intended!).

Whilst we're taking things slow and seeing what develops, I am so happy in myself... .I have established a routine in which I see plenty of my son, and the girl I have started speaking with completely understands.

So, no matter how desperate you feel, no matter how deep down you are dragged, there is a better, happier time out there for everyone. It's just staying strong, drawing on your values and believing in yourself that will see you through to the light... .

[CC85]

So, not quite a month after my ex finally moved out after months of turmoil, lies, cheating and effectively not really being in a relationship, I just wanted to share some positive vibes with anyone who may find themselves in a real hard place right now dealing with a split with someone suffering with BPD or BPD traits... .

I hit rock bottom, to the point I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, dreaded the weekends, the morning and generally being around people... .but like a boxer who had taken so many blows he should be finished, I thought no, I'm getting myself up and I will win the next round... .

So, I started slow, going on Tinder of all things... .not looking for anything, more just to reassure myself that I was a "normal" bloke who could eventually meet someone new in the future, not that I felt ready for it.

Well, about 3 weeks ago I started chatting to a girl who like me has a child, and we quickly hit it off and it became apparent we were on the same wavelength. We've only met briefly, but it is so refreshing to chat to someone in a mature manner, share a mutual respect of each other and understand each other. I would actually say, I have had more meaningful conversation with this girl in the 3 weeks I've known her than I did in 4 years of being with my ex udBPDgf.

I've got my motivation back, I've got back in the gym, getting my fitness going and I feel like I have escaped the shackles of BPD and am running free (no Iron Maiden pun intended!).

Whilst we're taking things slow and seeing what develops, I am so happy in myself... .I have established a routine in which I see plenty of my son, and the girl I have started speaking with completely understands.

So, no matter how desperate you feel, no matter how deep down you are dragged, there is a better, happier time out there for everyone. It's just staying strong, drawing on your values and believing in yourself that will see you through to the light... .

[Teereese]

  CC85

Awesome 

Thank you for sharing. I am recently divorced from BPD and it does get better.

I do not feel ready for a new r/s but am working towards that point.

We all need to hear positive outcomes, whether newly broken up, in the dregs, etc.