Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
July 10, 2025, 02:38:28 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Popular books with members
103
Surviving a
Borderline Parent
Emotional Blackmail
Fear, Obligation, and Guil
t
When Parents Make
Children Their Partners
Healing the
Shame That Binds You
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
> Topic:
Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Grieving the BPD narsassist mother (Read 693 times)
rugby
Fewer than 3 Posts
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2
Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
«
on:
April 01, 2016, 06:40:27 PM »
Hi, my mother was a BPD queen to 5 daughters. I say was because she died 13yrs ago age 59. When she collapsed in front of me, I had to resussitate her. The sad thing is, it was the first time my lips had touched hers. My mother was the queen to 5 daughters, 2 have diagnosis, and 1sister is still in denial, me I have abbandonment issue's. I'm not sure how I came through this without having a diagnosis of my own. My mother created a queen BPD, a waif, and a hermit, so I have been entangled with all this illness. I am just in the process of no contact with all my siblings, because I thought the prison sentence would be over when she died, not for me, my siblings are now turning into her and there's 4 of them
. I have keep my sense of humour, because that's what helps you get throuh this mess. I came to this site for advice and support. I have lost all of my family due to this terrible illness.
Logged
Kwamina
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 3544
Re: Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
«
Reply #1 on:
April 01, 2016, 09:26:10 PM »
Hi rugby
Thanks for introducing yourself and welcome to our online family
BPD really is quite a complex and challenging disorder. I am sorry that it has affected you and your family so much.
Seeing your mother collapse in front of you is quite traumatic. Did you get help after that event to help you deal with what happened?
You are now dealing with disordered siblings. Two of them have been diagnosed, with BPD I presume? What led up to them getting diagnosed? Are they being treated for their issues?
Good thing that you've been able to keep your sense of your humor through all of this. Dealing with multiple BPD family-members isn't easy. I am glad you are reaching out for support and advice here and encourage you to also read the stories of other members and check out the resources on this site. Many of our members know what it's like to have BPD parents and/or siblings and will be able to relate to you. Reading their stories and how they cope can be very insightful.
Take care
Logged
Oh, give me liberty! For even were paradise my prison, still I should long to leap the crystal walls.
rugby
Fewer than 3 Posts
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2
Re: Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
«
Reply #2 on:
April 01, 2016, 10:48:14 PM »
Hi thanks for your advice. I did get help for my sudden grief. I had a year's theropy for ptsd and clinical deppression. It as taken me 13yrs to get this far, because when my mother suddenly passed I was 2mths pregnant and had to put my grief on hold, so I could concentrate on having my baby.
At the time I was unaware of my mother's diagnosis, but I had always known from being small she was not right, unlike my sister's they are still in denial and won't have anything negative said about her. I believe this is because we we're raised to never speak Ill of the dead.
It's been one of the hardest decisions to leave my family and I move home far away from them, I move on the 16th April. I have no choice in doing this, it's to protect my children, because I can handle there manipulation, lies, even theft but I can't cope when they say things to my children, it's like I'm the child again, reliving the trauma. I am sorry if my writings not that great, I did'nt go to school much, not by choice. X
Logged
Kwamina
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 3544
Re: Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
«
Reply #3 on:
April 02, 2016, 02:19:53 PM »
Hi again rugby
No need to apologize, I can follow your writing just fine
Did your mother make it hard for you to go to school? Did she perhaps prevent you from going and/or cause you stress when you were in school?
When dealing with disordered family-members, boundaries are very important to keep yourself safe. Boundaries help preserve your own well-being. Since your disordered family-members are affecting you so, I understand why you are taking steps to distance yourself from them. Not just for yourself, but also to protect your children. How do your siblings treat your children?
No contact (NC) of course doesn't necessarily have to last forever. The most important thing is that we are mindful of our own well-being and are able to set and defend/enforce boundaries with our BPD family-members, regardless of the level of contact we have with them.
Logged
Oh, give me liberty! For even were paradise my prison, still I should long to leap the crystal walls.
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
> Topic:
Grieving the BPD narsassist mother
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...