Dreading the Weekend

[Depression = 72% of members]

Does anyone else have trouble on the weekends?

For me the weekends were initially the best times. During the idealization times my ex would take me out to theater on Saturdays. Or we'd see friends, go out for dinners, have endless conversations, and make incredible love. I have never felt as happy as those times. I was in bliss.

In the devaluations, which grew longer and longer, Saturdays became the days my ex would attack me most often. I lost count of the times he would berate me at length, chew me out and yell until I was sobbing, then throw his things in his car and peel off to give me the silent treatment.

So weekends for me are filled with both very good memories and the most traumatizing times of my adult life.

It's Friday afternoon and my stomach is tight already. I'm trying to stay busy on the weekends, but really, nothing much seems to help.

[HurtinNW]

Does anyone else have trouble on the weekends?

For me the weekends were initially the best times. During the idealization times my ex would take me out to theater on Saturdays. Or we'd see friends, go out for dinners, have endless conversations, and make incredible love. I have never felt as happy as those times. I was in bliss.

In the devaluations, which grew longer and longer, Saturdays became the days my ex would attack me most often. I lost count of the times he would berate me at length, chew me out and yell until I was sobbing, then throw his things in his car and peel off to give me the silent treatment.

So weekends for me are filled with both very good memories and the most traumatizing times of my adult life.

It's Friday afternoon and my stomach is tight already. I'm trying to stay busy on the weekends, but really, nothing much seems to help.

[prisonmike]

I dread the weekends too. It seems that just about every weekend we get into a fight. Mostly it's because I'm trying to do the things I enjoy doing, like hanging out with my brother and my parents or going golfing and fishing with my best friend. I become the ass on weekends because I'm "selfish" and I "don't care" and I leave her to "do everything". And so she gets mad and angry (which of course comes with insults and threats and devaluations) and I usually end up staying out with my buddies too late and get too drunk and sleep on my parent's couch or if I'm lucky I get to sleep on my own couch. I usually play it off for everyone else like "yeah we just had a few too many beers by the fire so I figured I should stay here instead of driving home." But it's a bad dangerous unhealthy cycle and it usually starts with me trying to figure out a way to just go do something I enjoy.

[WoundedBibi]

Nope, since I'm ill all days are sort of the same. The difference between weekdays and weekends is that my physiotherapist doesn't come and my T doesn't call. Other than that it's all the same to me. I'm inside watching the world go by, happy when it's raining because I'm nicely tucked up inside anyway and happy when the sun shines now too because since this week I've been able to sit outside on my balcony. I'm trying to think of things I can do that aren't too physically demanding but still challenging enough for me to keep improving my health and I rest a lot in between because I can't stand or sit very long.

This week I cooked my own dinner, Thursday I think it was. Another milestone! Nothing from the microwave. Took a lot of effort and I had to sit down a lot at the cooker and when chopping the veggies but I managed in the end. Courghetti. Or zucchghetti depending on where you live. Granted a lot of carrots and leaks ended up on the floor and I didn't manage to clean them up very well as I was knackered by then so this weekend I'm cleaning 

[Stripey77]

Yes.

I spent nearly the entire of every weekend with my BF as soon as I finished work, and since he discarded me so brutally and abruptly (the 2nd time) I had to completely rebuild my life and find new ways to fill the weekend. Slowly but surely it's getting there, but there were some very lonely times, very. I can get through the week ok with work and the gym, etc. but it has been a horrible with the weekend looming every time like clockwork and no boyfriend to spend it with. I am perfectly capable of keeping busy, it's just that we spent the weekends doing day trips around the island, out for drinks, dinners... .the usual stuff. Maybe out partying and socialising, or just on the beach.  It left a massive, massive chasm and practically every single friend I have, here and at home, has a partner. Even though they come out and spend 'girly' time with me and are not joined at the hip to their partners, and in fact everyone socialises as a group, the bottom line is, we all used to be a group of couples, including me, and they are all going home to their partners when I go home alone. That hurts. But it won't be forever... .it can't be. This can't be it. 

It has got better by keeping busy, keeping active, taking up as many invitations as possible, networking and socialising. But yes, the weekends are the hardest.

[prisonmike]

and they are all going home to their partners when I go home alone. That hurts.

I feel your pain, I had some break-ups with people I actually wanted to be with and the void afterward can be devastating. But this time around I am so looking forward to being single. I can't wait to do what I want when I want without having someone questioning my every move and treating me like the biggest ass just because I'm doing something that isn't all about them. Being single can be a wonderful thing. You can get to know yourself better and become your own person. Then when you are at peace with yourself and your life you will find someone who fits perfectly into your life. You have to be happy with yourself first and then everything else will fall into place.