I am no longer attracted to her, I no longer miss her

[trilen]

Hi All,
  I have posted on here a few times in the last year. This relationship and break up was the hardest thing I have ever been through... and I have been alive a long time.

The good news is: You will get through it, I promise. I am no longer attracted to her, I no longer miss her, I'm not jealous or hurt by anything she is doing now. I honestly don't care and am soo happy to be done with her. No contact was very helpful and I did force myself to go on some dates,and it helped me move on from her. You don't have to marry the first or second person you meet but get out and do something... it helps. Meeting new people is a great distraction. If nothing else you'll make a friend. I am in a good relationship now with no drama, and it is awesome.

Sometimes I feel that the memories of that relationship are like a piece of gum on my shoe. I have flashbacks of things that happened - my shrink says this is similar to PTSD. They pop into my head often. Wondering if they will go away in time and if there is something I can do to speed up the process. I feel pissed at the things she did and said and a pissed that I stayed for 2.5 years.I also feel really bad for the woman she is now seeing... .I wish someone would have warned me early on... .strange how her family and friends who know, watch and wait each time this BPD nightmare reels a new one in... .

[bunny4523]

Thank you for sharing!  I think it is really important for those on this site to see the "happy ending."  I really enjoyed your story and can relate.  Being in a healthy loving relationship is so amazing.  I too struggle with the memories or when "similar situations" arise in my new relationshp but an argument over the trash no longer results in a break up which is very refreshing.  It usually ends in some funny faces, sarcastic comments and alot of hugs and kisses.  Life is good and life is so much easier than it has ever been.  I have no feelings at all for my ex, not even anger.  I have to really sit down and think hard and usually it arises out of what he did to my boys. 
I'm indifferent which I reserve for very few people.  My other ex's I still care for and would be there if they need me. 

Gosh... .I do actually think about the poor women that will fall into this mess.  How good they think he is now and how confused and afraid they will be when the flying monkeys show up.  I do not wish that upon anyone and I hope they are well enough to know it's him, not them and get out. 

Bunny