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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
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Author Topic: Local support groups?  (Read 563 times)
bestintentions
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 105


« on: September 27, 2016, 10:58:07 AM »

I apologize if this has been addressed in other threads but I haven't seen anything in the minimal searching I've done.  Has anyone here met other locals through private messaging, etc., that lead to personal interactions/group support?  I live in the southeastern Wisconsin area and would love to meet up with a group of people (even one person going through the same thing TBH) to offer each other support in our various stages of detaching/moving on.  This site has been a life-saver for me but I think actual meetings would benefit recovery as well.  Googling reveals little more than divorce support groups in this area, and even those are spotty.  I'd love to hear thoughts on this idea... .thanks

bi
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fromheeltoheal
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642


« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2016, 11:41:41 AM »

Hi bestintentions-

Have you considered going to a therapist or counselor in your area?  The advantages can include the fact they're easy to find and they're trained to understand and help with the issues we address here.  That along with connecting with us here can be two components of an effective treatment plan, as you grieve, process and detach.
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bestintentions
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 105


« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2016, 01:13:27 PM »

I am lucky to have befriended a therapist many years ago who's been a wonderful resource during this challenging time.  There's nothing in the area that seems to cater specifically to BPD/codependency/caretaking, so I figured I'd throw it out here and see what happened.  Thanks for the response, hopefully others will chime in as well.

bi
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Sadly
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Very Single
Posts: 886



« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2016, 01:49:39 PM »

I think it's a great idea, virtual hugs are lovely but proper hugs and meaningful face to face conversations would be great. Unfortunately I live in Norfolk in the UK, too far to pop over. We also don't have the access to therapy quite as easily either. I think I mentioned the other day, my doctor gave me a helpline number and I got to talk to two people. One who lost interest when he realised I wasn't about to leap off the top of a multi storey car park and the other who thought BPD was a sexually transmitted infection.   Smiling (click to insert in post) . I would love to have therapy or a support group, mind you, I don't know how I would manage without my family here.
Love from Sadly x
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Never let someone be your priority whilst you remain their option
bestintentions
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 105


« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2016, 09:48:56 AM »

What about a group video chat like Google Hangouts?  Does that appeal to anyone?  Not as good as physically meeting but could make for more of a connection between people than text.  Just a thought... .
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fromheeltoheal
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642


« Reply #5 on: September 28, 2016, 11:17:33 AM »

Not as good as physically meeting but could make for more of a connection between people than text.

You're right bestintentions, written communication is the weakest form of communication since we don't get the body language, facial expressions and tone of voice that are most of the communication between people.  An upside to that here is we can express ourselves safely and anonymously without needing to consider how what we say will be received as much, and removing that social component is freeing, plus we've all been there so the feedback we do get can be especially useful.

Many of us have found that a combination of sites like this, personal therapy or counseling, and the building of real-world relationships locally can be effective as we detach from a borderline and create and empowered future.  I encourage you to dive in and tell us how your detachment is going; what's going on for you today?
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