Repeated Stress and Hurt

[byronvoyle]

In the time since I left my ex-lover with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), I have been experiencing a mix of emotions. We broke up after a heated argument in May, which culminated in her threatening to call the police and start recording me after things calmed down. The next day, I felt remorseful and tried to reach out, but she told me the relationship was irreparable.

We continued the cycle of on-and-off contact, with her often saying she couldn’t continue but then coming back. Every time I tried to distance myself, she would text, and I would eventually agree to talk. During that time, she would break down, expressing that she didn’t want to live anymore. I tried to be supportive, both emotionally and financially, but it was the same: arguments, stress, and back to silence.

After my last contact to suggest a fresh start, she cut off contact and blocked me, saying we needed to move on. Despite my efforts to go no contact and respect her boundaries, I still felt confused and unsure if it was all just manipulation to gain support. I didn’t want to repeat the same cycles and hoped my silence would show her that she could lose me if she didn’t change. This caused me psychological stress as I tried to balance going no contact with maintaining my self-respect.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Granite Chief]

This is extremely stressful and confusing I know. Work on yourself and start dating again. She may be back or may not be back. Either way, this will make you stronger.