Good book to - perhaps - tell her about BPD

[joshbjoshb]

So we are married for 11 years. I brought the idea of going to Therapy many times. Some success, many setbacks, I worked on myself and I am in a much better state of mind now.

But she is not.

Any book I can bring that will perhaps tell her about what BPD is, without saying the word BPD? I am concerned she will be all worried I "diagnosed her" and go crazy.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Tattered Heart]

Is your partner open to T? Does she admit that she is a part of the problem?

What are you hoping will happen if she learns about BPD?

Our workshop on Telling Someone You Think They Have BPD might help you explore this topic further.

[pearlsw]

Hi joshbjoshb,

I'm no expert, but I can't imagine a book such as you describe. Do you think she is open to this or will it lead to more difficulties?

My "h" and I have had open discussions about such things... .In our case he recognizes it, identifies with and wants to do something about it... .at other times he is totally against and wants to do nothing and blames all of our problems on me. So, like TH says, it seems like a good idea to examine your goal with this? If the goal is that she'll see logic and reason and then change... .well, your expectations might need to be readjusted. What do you think?

wishing you well, pearl.