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VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?" Parental alienation is when a parent allows a child to participate or hear them degrade the other parent. This is not uncommon in divorces and the children often adjust. In severe cases, however, it can be devastating to the child. This video provides a helpful overview.
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Author Topic: financial questions in dealing with BPD mother and courts  (Read 417 times)
truthbeknown
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« on: May 29, 2018, 09:07:36 PM »

I have been working crappy jobs and just barely surviving since my divorce.   Financially, i am drowning and i have felt like it's a double bind to make more money because if she asked for modification then it would thart all my efforts in increasing my income.  It's not that i haven't tried but things have not gone in my favor since the divorce.  So now i have the opportunity to get some help from my Mom in trying to start a business.  The question that came up is there a way to protect my interests financially ?  someone said, "put the business in your mom's name and just have her pay you a salary."  I know this sounds bad but at the same time the unfairness of how the courts are with BPD parents is not right.   I'm just curious if there are plausible solutions out there to this kind of challenge? 
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GaGrl
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« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2018, 09:35:33 PM »

My DH is a financial advisor. He said, IN MOST STATES, it would be best to incorporate and make the loan a legitimate loan/obligation of the business. However, you want to avoid the appearance of anything that could be interpreted as avoiding alimony or child support calculations.

DH said this is a legal question... .not a financial structure question. During a divorce, it is all enmeshed and is open to discovery.
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"...what's past is prologue; what to come,
In yours and my discharge."
truthbeknown
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« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2018, 07:39:50 PM »

My DH is a financial advisor. He said, IN MOST STATES, it would be best to incorporate and make the loan a legitimate loan/obligation of the business. However, you want to avoid the appearance of anything that could be interpreted as avoiding alimony or child support calculations.

DH said this is a legal question... .not a financial structure question. During a divorce, it is all enmeshed and is open to discovery.

i'm divorced already.  So i just need to ask a lawyer this question?  any lawyers on here? Smiling (click to insert in post)
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ForeverDad
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« Reply #3 on: June 03, 2018, 11:05:21 PM »

So sorry, this is peer support, though we have "been there, done that" and so we often have a general feel for what works in most cases and what doesn't in most cases.  Legal advice is best obtained locally since laws and procedures vary by state and sometimes even by court to court.

Legal advice is confidential.  I believe lawyers can't spill the beans to your ex without risking reprimands or consequences.  Also, not all lawyers will answer a question identically so consult with one who is experienced, has time-tested strategies and is familiar with the local court.
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