Manipulation to interact

[crumber33]

My 30 bpd daughter gets really abusive and near violent when she huffs whippets. (nitros like you get at the dentist). Usually thru texts/calls. I'm learning how to disengage and tell her I'm going to take a break from communicating and I'll check back in at a certain time. And I do check back at that time.

Now when I check back in she always has an emergency - she's broken a bone, or she got raped, or cut an artery in the hour that I took a break. But, she calls me awful names and is abusive at the same time.

So, I want support her because she says she's been hurt, but I want to maintain boundaries when she's 's being abusive at the same time. I know in my heart this is manipulation, but I feel terrible thing that I'm so sorry you got raped but I can't talk to you if you're calling me names.

The abusive language is pretty extreme. I know she's doing the whippets because she's always demanding money when she's doing them. And her personality changes radically.

I would I really appreciate anything you can recommend. I've been reading posts on this website and it so helpful. I go to therapy when I can afford it. This is my first time posting and just heartbroken and don't know what to do.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders