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Author Topic: Rigid thinking  (Read 508 times)
Kayclan

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Posts: 28


« on: August 12, 2019, 08:04:30 AM »

I haven't been here for a while, just been tired and keeping my head above water.
What is it with my family member that she is so rigid? Is it a thing with BPD? My sister has been temporarily living with me for a year.
This is what I mean by rigid. I neeed to place a peice of furniture into her room. It's a desk and it would be of benefit to her as she is studying. Then I can move another bit of furniture into the garage.
Well 1st I think she may have vacuumed the room only once and she has stored some things on the floor.
Today I asked her again...when do you think you'll be ready to move the desk.  The answer as always came back " it's on the list , I can't do it right now". She cannot deviate from this list. She appears to be controlled by it. Is it her attempting to keep control of her life. She is germ phobic but doesn’t seem to realise that dust is bad. It's driving me nuts. And I need to move the other furniture into the garage because it's near the front door .
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JNChell
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Dissolved
Posts: 3520



« Reply #1 on: August 12, 2019, 08:15:43 AM »

Hi Kayclan and welcome back! Sounds like you’re pretty frustrated with your current situation and we’d like to help you alleviate that. Is your sister diagnosed with BPD? Also, can you provide us with a little background on what led you to  bpdfamily? We understand the difficulties of having a family member wBPD and are looking forward to talking with you about it.
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Harri
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981



« Reply #2 on: August 12, 2019, 09:09:15 PM »

Hi again!

Two suggetions for ya:

First, tell her that she needs to move the desk (or make room for i so you can) by Saturday of this week.  Don't give her the ability to avoid doing so.  it is your house and yes, you want her to be comfortable but you also need to be comfortable.  What do you think?

Second, spend time here and post and read even when there are not issues or when you are not at your limits.  It is hard to problem solve and strategize when we are upset and stressed.   

It sounds like she will never be ready to move the desk so you need to change your approach. 
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: "Divorced"/abandoned by SO in Feb 2014; Mother with BPD, PTSD, Depression and Anxiety: RIP in 2021.
Posts: 12183


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« Reply #3 on: August 12, 2019, 10:08:00 PM »

It sounds like she might have an OCD or Anxiety thing going on.  What are your thoughts on moving the desk to the garage in the meantime, or do you think that might set her off?
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