Oh dear lord the mood swings

[Lola B]

She is back from college for her birthday weekend. She is severely depressed and manifests it through sheer hostility. She’s lost most of her friends because of it and I am thinking of exorcism to relieve her of what must be sheer misery to feel.

I have been open to meds, therapies, homeopathy, etc for my mood issues, but I understand this is different and in my opinion worse. I have been able to stay detached and leave if she attacks.

I think desperately about what different choices I should have made to keep her from this pain.

Does anything at all work for people suffering with BPD? Her system is calibrated to 37 on a scale of 1-10.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[PeaceMom]

Lola,
My DD has not gotten any relief from psych meds, but in the hospital 2 times ago a psychiatrist finally said she could try fish oil and magnesium. I never see anyone here talking about homeopathic solutions so maybe we are not supposed to! (?)
I told that P-Doc that I’d read a recent study that showed a certain hospital with suicidal patients were all low in Magnesium.
My H and I think it (Magnesium) has helped us tremendously with sleep and lowering our anxiety amidst the sheer chaos in our home.
Is your DD open to dietary changes, homeopathic treatment or other wellness options? We were told years ago that DD needed to see a Dietician because her eating habits are awful. She refuses.

[Lola B]

I will do as you say immediately! I take both. She is passively suicidal. She doesn’t want to be here anymore. Thank you very much and good luck and much strength to you all.

[Lola B]

Am I seeing a rare manifestation of BPD or is the afflicted person typically vehemently allergic to accountability? My daughter is the victim of everything. Even when her moods put her in the circumstances she bemoans. She would launch a nuclear missile if she had one when accused of being wrong. And bitterly complain about the fallout.

I will probably post all weekend to get through.

[PeaceMom]

The book “Loving Someone with BPD” addresses everything you have described. We all here see many of the same behaviors that a “classic BPD”. I told myself I’d immediately reread the book once I finished to solidify everything I had learned, I was just in awe of how Shari Manning perfectly described what we see everyday in DD19. These were behaviors that I couldn’t even put into words for my T.
I so appreciate having terms to use like “radical acceptance” “apparent competency”, “unrelenting crisis” and many more.
Hang in there and post whenever you feel like it!

[FaithHopeLove]

Am I seeing a rare manifestation of BPD or is the afflicted person typically vehemently allergic to accountability?

You are not seeing anything rare. What you describe is typical
 People with BPD live in sheer emotion. Their feelings are facts to them. They have a very hard time stepping back and objectively evaluating their behavior. They just react. That makes accountability very difficult. My son also has a hard time figuring out cause and effect. Things can get better particularly if they find a good therapist. Parents are too close to help. You are doing all you can
 Focus on you. The better you get the more stabilizing an influence you will be.

[Lola B]

Thank you all very much for your comfort and advice. I am a single parent who has lost many friends because of the confusing nature of my home life and will probably never partner up again because people outside of the relationship cant be expected to tolerate it.

That makes things lonely and boring. My DD loathes all of the friends I have left and my family, which has significant dysfunction also.

At least I am improving from my injuries to where I am not disabled.

Thank goodness for this site. I found it just in time.

[FaithHopeLove]

I am glad you found us, Lola