Hello

[Ejdecker28]

I believe that my mother suffers from BPD. Learning about this disorder was a cathartic day in my life as the criterion described her to a tee. I felt like I had been the problem for all of my life. I remember that despite my father being a pediatrician and having a good upper middle class upbringing I was miserable. I never knew what to expect when I came home from school. Hopefully, she would be holed up in her bed. However, too many afternoons were spent absorbing her rages. When I went through my teenage years and rebelled slightly, I was the problem. I was sent to the psychiatrist and loaded up on meds -because “I was the one with the problem” and played the part. I even made up psychiatric problems. I don’t know why no one ever saw that the real problem was her, especially since my dad was a pediatrician (he only left after we were grown).

Anyway, its late. Thank you for letting me join.

[Harri]

Hi and

I am glad you found us and are reaching out for support.  We can all relate to having a family member with BPD or BPD traits and many of us have a mother with it.  It was cathartic for me too when i first learned of BPD thanks to a counselor I was seeing at the time.  It was huge for me as I too thought I was the problem.  Learning about BPD gave me a whole new perspective.

It is awful that you were put on meds for something that was not really your fault or problem when you were a teen.  I am sorry for that. 

How is your relationship with your mom today?  What about your dad?

I hope you settle in and read and jump into other threads and join us.  We all support each other here and the best thing is we get it. 

Again, welcome.

[Methuen]

Hello ejdecker28

I am so sorry you had to go through being blamed and put on meds (even though your dad was a Dr), but it is a great thing that you have now discovered your mother's disorder and can start moving forward.

I didn't figure it out until I was 57.  I have read posts on this board from people who figured it out in their 70's, or sometimes after the BPD parent had passed.

It's never too late.  Learning how to navigate the challenge is a process, but I believe it's worth it.  And the support on this board is amazing.

Welcome.