Hi LouisaCarn,
I don't have a Therapist for you but did want to encourage your pursuit of one, and encourage you to hang around here too. There is support and there are tools that can help in how we non-bpd family react and interact with out family members with BPD/BPD Traits.
Maybe ask your family physician for some Therapist recommendations to get you started, if you have an EAP (Employee Assistance Program) through your employer that might be another avenue to get some suggested Therapists (and maybe some free visits), ask friends if they know of anyone, or if you are in the states you might check out Psychology Today...
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us.
Come here anytime you need to talk...we all get it.
Panda39