How do I communicate with my BPD sister when she doesn’t acknowledge her illness

[Depression = 72% of members]

 
Hi there, my 56 year old sister was recently diagnosed with BPD and depression. I have been supportive throughout her life ...always there . At the moment she denies her diagnosis and has taken herself off her meds for he depression. She does not want or feel she needs DBT therapy. I respect that it’s her decision... and have not interfered with her decision , as painful as that is...
I seem to be a trigger for her rages... everything is “my fault”... to protect my emotional well being, I am not talking to her after she blew up at me again . She has not reached out and neither have I . She has lots of support from our other two siblings and friends. I want to resume our relationship without setting her off. I don’t want to condone her abusive language and behaviour towards me...help

[rockinro]

 
Hi there, my 56 year old sister was recently diagnosed with BPD and depression. I have been supportive throughout her life ...always there . At the moment she denies her diagnosis and has taken herself off her meds for he depression. She does not want or feel she needs DBT therapy. I respect that it’s her decision... and have not interfered with her decision , as painful as that is...
I seem to be a trigger for her rages... everything is “my fault”... to protect my emotional well being, I am not talking to her after she blew up at me again . She has not reached out and neither have I . She has lots of support from our other two siblings and friends. I want to resume our relationship without setting her off. I don’t want to condone her abusive language and behaviour towards me...help

[Kwamina]

Hi rockinro and welcome to BPDFamily

Now that your sister has been officially diagnosed, you do at least know what you are dealing with. It is unfortunate though that she at this point seems to deny her diagnosis, is not taking the medication she has been prescribed and does not want to participate in DBT.

What led up to her now being officially diagnosed with BPD and depression? Was there a specific event leading up to this happening now?

I think it is wise that you indeed also consider your own emotional well-being since dealing with a disordered family-member can be very challenging and draining, particularly when the family-member does not really acknowledge her/his own disruptive behaviors..

You mention the support she gets from your other two sibling and friends. In what ways do they support her? How do your other siblings feel about your BPD sister's behavior?

The Board Parrot

[Harri]

Hi.  I want to join Kwamina in saying welcome! 

I want to resume our relationship without setting her off. I don’t want to condone her abusive language and behaviour towards me...help

As you read and share more here, we can help you.  right now it is hard to offer guidance as we need more details so over time please do share what you are comfortable sharing.  We have lots of tools and strategies that can help us improve things.

I hope to hear more from you soon.

Again,