I recently had to break up with my love who has BPD. I am devastated..

[j2390]

I have recently had to break up with the love of my life who was recently becoming diagnosed with BPD. Due to having to separate from Covid to separate countries he became extremely cruel and I unfortunately had to completely end everything. Its been four days of no contact and I am devastated. We need help. At least I do, can someone help me understand... 

[getout2020]

I have "separate countries" in my unfortunate experience as well. What do you think would be helpful? I'm here to listen. It sounds like you just went NC very recently, so this is probably very overwhelming and scary for you? I know it was for me. It still is.

The distance and separation with added COVID restrictions is also particularly challenging, but it seems like it might be a good thing longterm - because my own impulses are still to try to go back, to fix, to mend and to caretake - but I'm literally prevented by impassable borders from doing so. There's no "back" to go to.

I think you'll find this is a great place full of knowledgeable people who are likewise in this to try to make sense of their experience(s) as well as help others make sense of their own. One thing that has been very helpful for me to read some of the other threads here and see all the similarities to what I've been through and what I'm still going through.

Hang in there.