My first post - the next step

[HeartGlow]

Hi Message Board Cyber family,

I was about to call this the first step, but it is anything but. I have been dealing with the current situation since at least the early 1990's, if not longer. I have tried both therapy for myself and couples therapy for us. Most of all, I just put up with it. Not much of a step.

I just found out about "Borderline Personality Disorder" this year from a good friend who was SERVELY hurt in a whirlwind 2.5 year relationship. She was his first relationship after his wife/partner of thirty+ years died a five years ago. His details are as horrible an example as any in the books, including court cases and restraining orders.

Mine is nothing that extreme, but still damaging and ongoing.

After Thanksgiving, we compared notes on our partners' issues, how it affected our lives, and what to do about it. He helped me see how I could effect change by focusing on myself and not trying to fix her. Or hoping she would fix herself.

And most of all, he got me started reading Walking on Eggshells.

I am looking for a good therapist in the Baltimore Maryland area. If anyone has a recommendation, I am all ears. I have a few referrals already, and am eager to start interviewing and finding a good fit. It's a New Year filled with good changes.

Happy 2021 to all,

HeartGlow

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[PearlsBefore]

It can be difficult to spot on this site, but in a moment you'll have a private message which is visible at https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?action=pm (and I believe oddly they are in reverse chronological order so scroll to the bottom of the inbox)