Great thread idea. The gifts thing...! Same thing here. He'd do or say something hurtful and then turn up with flowers or homemade cake the next day – even when we had successfully resolved the argument.
I have some additions.
- Intense intimacy ALWAYS followed by either a) a HUGE argument or b) suddenly retreating and dropping off the map; often both in rapid succession. (Logic: "I'll leave her before she can leave me.")
- Accompanying me on a run despite my repeated insistence that I wanted to go for a run alone. He didn't even have workout clothes at my place, so he ran in his normal clothes and shoes. I tried to dissuade him and told him he'd look like a stalker chasing a random jogger. This didn't deter him.
- Telling me that he didn't like me seeing my extremely gay (!) best friend on my own, stating: "When you're in a relationship you do everything together, so my future picture is us three always meeting up together."
- Trying to forbid me from any interactions with any men anywhere, be they acquaintances or complete strangers.
- Sobbing and crying on the phone when I once (!) tried to postpone one of our hangout evenings because I needed to sort out some unrelated issues.
Short of the insane jealousy, I actually
liked the clinging. I thought it showed he cared. I also liked his sweetness and the torrents of physical affection he'd provide and demand.
The whole thing only came apart when his "retreats" became more frequent and longer than a reasonable person would have been willing to bear. Ironically, he also was virtually never there when I needed him for a change.
