Beginner

[Depression = 72% of members]

My husband was recently diagnosed with BPD. In reading about this disorder it doesn’t seem like he had these symptoms before we were married. But now I feel I’m constantly waiting for the next blow up and have no idea what’s going to set him off. He’s a walking contradiction and the emotional roller coaster is causing me my own health problems. I’m reading “Stop Walking on Eggshells” and have been seeing a counselor for a few years but I need to know I’m not in this alone. I need advice for coping with these outbursts and making time for myself that won’t make things worse.

[Struggling494]

My husband was recently diagnosed with BPD. In reading about this disorder it doesn’t seem like he had these symptoms before we were married. But now I feel I’m constantly waiting for the next blow up and have no idea what’s going to set him off. He’s a walking contradiction and the emotional roller coaster is causing me my own health problems. I’m reading “Stop Walking on Eggshells” and have been seeing a counselor for a few years but I need to know I’m not in this alone. I need advice for coping with these outbursts and making time for myself that won’t make things worse.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Cat Familiar]

  Welcome! We understand. I didn’t seen any obvious BPD behaviors for a couple of years after I married my husband. It comes as a real shock when Dr. Jeckyl leaves the premises and Mr. Hyde shows up!

Have you looked at the Tools section at the top of your screen?

I highly recommend Boundaries as a way to find time for self care, set limits of what you will tolerate, and make sure you are remaining true to yourself.

[thankful person]

Welcome, you are certainly not alone in this and we also all understand that there is little support in real life, most probably people might just tell you to leave if you told them the truth of what you’re dealing with. I’ve been with my wife seven years and found this forum six months ago. The people here are so kind and helpful. You really can make a difference in how you respond to your husband. It was a relief to learn that I didn’t just have to wait for my wife to realise she needs help. Even if they never make that choice, you can stop make huge improvements to the relationship on your own. I wish you all the best.