New Member Reaching out for Introduction & Support

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hello all!

I recently discovered my mother has BDP, and am exploring all of the ways this has affected me and impacted my life. I don't really feel like my friends or other family members understand or are willing to admit to and cope with the situation, so I've really been feeling the weight of our relationship for a long time.

I'm in the middle of reading Walking on Eggshells which is where I found this group, I was so excited at the prospect of meeting other people who may have similar experiences to mine. Feel free to reach out, thanks!

[MathWizJohn]

Hello all!

I recently discovered my mother has BDP, and am exploring all of the ways this has affected me and impacted my life. I don't really feel like my friends or other family members understand or are willing to admit to and cope with the situation, so I've really been feeling the weight of our relationship for a long time.

I'm in the middle of reading Walking on Eggshells which is where I found this group, I was so excited at the prospect of meeting other people who may have similar experiences to mine. Feel free to reach out, thanks!

[Rev]

Hi MathWiz,

I'm just popping in to say high - this isn't the board that I hang out on.

But if I see that your post falls through the cracks, I'll be sure to alert someone who is closer to your situation.

In the meantime, WELCOME!  You'll find a lot of good support here. Lot's of wisdom and ZERO judgement.

Rev

[Mommeredith81]

Hi John. I suspect the same of my mom, who also has paranoia. It was so hard during my childhood to put my finger one some of the things that were "off" about her - telling me all my relatives were awful, painting people black, clinging to others. To this day I help her out but set boundaries. What's your relationship with your mom like today? As Rev said, if no one responds, don't think no one can relate...may just have missed your post. It's hard for people to understand parents with BPD and NPD because a parent is supposed to be there for a child, but I've also met many people who had a difficult relationship with their mom or dad with a personality disorder. The key is appropriate boundaries. Welcome!

[Woolspinner2000]

Hey MathWiz, 

Welcome to the PSI board! That's a great book you're reading, so validating. Many here have read it. What are a couple of the biggest revelations to you so far as you've read?

My mom was an uBPD, and I was well into my adult years before I discovered BPD and things finally started making sense. As you mentioned, there is a huge impact upon our lives from growing up with a pwBPD. The members here really do understand.

Looking forward to hearing more from you.

 
Wools

[NarcsEverywhere]

Hey MathWizJohn,

It can be a lot to take in and understand and it is super invalidating to talk to random people, like friends and family about it, because they manipulate those people too, so even if they saw it, they were tricked into interpreting it a certain way, because they only see what's on the outside, not all the hidden stuff.

Your instincts are right though, talking to people with similar experiences and emotionally mature people/professionals like counselors are your best bet at healing, because most people don't have the knowledge and experience to understand this stuff, it's super complicated.

[zachira]

Your story is so familiar to so many of us here, as so many members have discovered that their mother has/had BPD after many years of looking for an explanation for their mother's aberrant behaviors. My mother with BPD is deceased. We are here to listen and support you. Let us know what your concerns are and we will try to help as best we can.