Hey Let Me Out,
Having your ex manipulate the truth and your 35 year old son has to be very angering. But try not to take his behavior personal. He's BPD and has essentially lost most of his power over you. He feels victimized by your empowerment and feels entitled to ruffled whatever feathers you have left. A finalized divorce is proof of that. Unfortunately they sometimes will even use their own children as a tool of manipulation. The only thing you can do is communicate to your son the truth. Your son will eventually see the truth of his father.
Is there a way to make sure your ex is not allowed on your job again? Perhaps tell your HR, get a restraining order, or call the authorities? You cannot have a civilized communication with an enraged, victimized BPD! They will pretzel twist, confabulate, lie-tell and do anything to feel like winners! If you try to communicate with him you will be right where he wants you: disempowered and on his level.
Let me out. You have power. Keep the spotlight of healing on you and make it your goal to not be reactionary with your ex. This is what he desires:
negative attention. He feeds off of it. It doesn't matter when he'll move on. What matters is that
YOU'VE moved. He is no longer your problem.
My ex did a nasty smear campaign. He told me he was happier with the new object. Told me that his life was better without me and pretty much tried to kill me with his words. But you have to see their behaviors for what they are: the desperation of misery loving company. And they'll do it do anyone who'll allow them to spew it.
BTW. You didn't "abandon" your now ex-husband. You've embraced you fully. Keep looking onward and forward. Your future is so bright it's blinding.
Spell
