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Skills we were never taught
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A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
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Author Topic: Depression on her bday  (Read 407 times)
romancandle
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« on: April 02, 2013, 06:22:25 PM »

So it's her birthday. This always means that she goes through in extreme emotional cycling. I try my best to handle it every year and every year she becomes extremely depressed and then aggressive towards me. Her birthday is in two days and I've gotten our presents and plan stuff with her and she just freaked out on me because I mentioned that we work, And that like we had discussed previously we would go out on the weekend. She's She got really upset with me and started crying and told me the same stuff she does every year. I don't care about her, I don't make her feel special, and I never put her first.

I'm not trying to make this into a rant, I love furniture about her and I try really hard every year around this time. It's very hard because her family is not around and she gets extremely depressed during her birthday and I'm the only one that she has to take it out on. Her family has some of the same issues that she does and she's completely severed all connections with them and I just don't know to do.

She's done everything on her birthday to show I don't know what she's trying to show. She does everything she can to push me away. One year she took all of her presents and threw them off of our balcony afar then apartment. Shubrook most of them and told me how it wasn't enough. And then another year she screamed at me because I didn't make her a cake but instead bought her one and that wasn't enough. Last year I made her a cake and butter presents but unfortunately a member of my family died unexpectedly two days before her birthday so we could go out on her birthday that was the day of the funeral it was a big shock and it was a very emotional time. This year I want to do something with her and I don't have a lot of money but I put it all into trying to make her birthday special, but she's already spinning into her birthday depression and I just don't know what to do. 

I really need some advice. I appreciate any input I don't know what to do this time of year is the most stressful time for me every year and it's just hard to know what to do in this situation.
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romancandle
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« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2013, 06:24:23 PM »

Please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. I'm using my talk to type feature because I'm I just can't type right now.

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Allotrion

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« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2013, 03:47:08 PM »

gred2012, I'm surprised this thread hasn't received any responses.  I understand what you go through every year.  My uBPDw is very much the same around her birthday.  She gets very depressed and angry and expects me to make it all better.  It's a day of reflection for them.  They get one year older and it's very scary for them.  One year older, more wrinkles, body is changing, things are dropping, she's ugly, men don't find her attractive, etc, etc... .     And she looks to me to make her feel attractive. 

I hope you made it through her birthday OK.  I understand what you are going through.  It's not easy.
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