Pyschological warfare- I hate him and he knows it

[b_girl]

Anyone else seen this? Borderline- The Ride" ?... .  www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRQdL8LLL9o

I have experienced 'both' these people from him. The most scariest thing ever and I want to be free.


My story... .  We are not even together, he left me and went back to his ex but he wont let me go. Now I'm trapped on Facebook. He posts 'memories' of our time together, threats, nasty songs. I took a week off to calm myself then posted some stuff last night trying to ignore him and get on with my life and have a laugh with my mates, but he thinks everything is about him when it really wasn't. I then I get this song below back from him... .  The video is even worse and has to be listened to be appreciated to be honest

www.youtube.com/watch?v=04F4xlWSFh0


Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the... .  floor

Beaten why for (why for)

Can't take much more

(here we go, here we go, here we go)

One - Nothing wrong with me

Two - Nothing wrong with me

Three - Nothing wrong with me

Four - Nothing wrong with me

One - Something's got to give

Two - Something's got to give

Three - Something's got to give

Now

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor

(Now)

Push me again (again)

This is the end

(here we go, here we go, here we go)

One - Nothing wrong with me

Two - Nothing wrong with me

Three - Nothing wrong with me

Four - Nothing wrong with me

One - Something's got to give

Two - Something's got to give

Three - Something's got to give

Now

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor


Skin against skin, blood and bone

You're all by yourself but you're not alone

You wanted in now you're here

Driven by hate consumed by fear

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor


One - Nothing wrong with me

Two - Nothing wrong with me

Three - Nothing wrong with me

Four - Nothing wrong with me

One - Something's got to give

Two - Something's got to give

Three - Something's got to give

Now

Let the bodies hit the floor

Let the bodies hit the floor

I want to leave Facebook but I am afraid to. I feel trapped. If I leave will he come after me in real life? Or is he just trying to scare me into silence. If I become silent, will he think I have abandoned him and come after me sweet as anything and I will end up back on the 'Borderline Ride' rollercoaster. Somebody tell me what to do, please. Ugh, such a nightmare. I hate him.

[b_girl]

Anyone, please?

[marbleloser]

I actually like that song,but then again I have a wide array of tastes in music. 

I can see where it would scare you for someone to actually send it to you though.Especially someone you've been in a RS with.

You're trapped by fear.It's what keeps so many in an abusive RS.The first thing you need to do at this time is go completely NC,so he can't use this fear against you.Block him from fb,don't answer any texts,delete any email accounts he knows about,or block him on them.

Has he ever been physically abusive to you?

[b_girl]

I like that song too. He always did have good taste in music. He wears his heart on his sleeve through songs and you can tell the story of his life/moods through his FB songs, which is why I know his moods and that song is NOT a good sign.

[marbleloser]

OK.I get that.Music is popular in all cultures because the songs have meaning and connect with each of us.Music can be used to change someone's mood,express oneself,motiviate us,etc.,,You don't listen to "The Carpenters" while exercising,but "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor",maybe.

Again,has he ever been physically violent?Has it been mostly verbal abuse?

What I'm trying to help you with is,right now what he's posting has you fearful.You're thinking that something bad is coming based on a song he posted.What if you hadn't seen his post?Would you still be in fear? If not,then what can you do to protect yourself from what he's posting,saying,or emailing?

You can't control what he's doing,but you can establish some boundaries to protect yourself.

[LoveNotWar]

So I'm old school, pushing 60, but I find it disturbing that he posted that on your FB.

Yes, I can see working out to that but as a FB posting he's sending a message of some sort. Could he be saying he's feeling crazy like the guy in the video? It's possible it's less of a threat and more of a statement?

HAS he ever physically attacked you or threatened to hurt you prior?

NC is good advice... .  no make that GREAT advice. I'd block him from FB but that's just me... .  again I'm old school. 

If you DO feel it's a threat to your safety you might go the legal route. Expect a reaction from him if you do that.

[b_girl]

Marbleloser

I would be afraid of him if I hadn't seen that because I know him and have experienced 'Borderline- The Ride' first hand and he WOULD have killed me if I was in the same room.

We saw each other the other day by accident and when I got back there was more stuff waiting for me saying that he had moved on, wouldn't kill me, had turned his back on me, we DON'T get on. But ever since he has kept up the abuse, threats, proving that he hasn't moved on at all, its like he want to keep us alive in his head, to re-live everything, to keep punishing me.

I have posted in New members if you want to read more about us.

[b_girl]

Lovenotwar, it is alarming. I don't know if he is saying that's how I make him feel, its how he feels regardless of me, or its a genuine threat to get me to go away, or he is laughing at me in some sick perverse way for putting up with his abuse, I don't know anything anymore.

I'm more worried that if I go and he feels like that, then he will feel abandoned or that I made him like that so he will come after me in real life. A restraining order wont stop him, that I know for certain.

[Suzn]

Lovenotwar, it is alarming. I don't know if he is saying that's how I make him feel, its how he feels regardless of me, or its a genuine threat to get me to go away, or he is laughing at me in some sick perverse way for putting up with his abuse, I don't know anything anymore.

It's good that you see the assumptions can be somewhat endless. We can play a guessing game all day. What's most important is to take steps to ensure your safety. Taking steps to remove this person from any contact momentarily to ease your fears may be helpful. Putting a plan in place for a time in order to accomplish this may be necessary, such as, staying with friends or family for a period of time so that you feel safe in knowing he doesn't know where you are. Giving some time between your efforts, such as blocking him on facebook, or deleting your account altogether for a while (you can go back later and re-activate, you loose nothing as far as contacts and posts to date, I've done this.), changing your phone number, blocking access to email (such as marking his emails as spam, they will go straight to the trash bin if you do this so you don't see them), etc... .  

If you find he is a real threat contacting the authorities can be helpful. Does he have any past run ins with the authorities that you know of? He may. Even if he doesn't, coming forward and bringing this behavior to light, so you are not handling this alone number 1, and number 2 starting a paper trail for anything happening in the future, for you or anyone else he may become involved with.