A nice ending with my T.

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

About a month ago I saw my T (a great woman social worker from a crisis shelter). This was about 6 months out from the final breakup with the ex.

Near the end she said she thought I was doing great and she felt we had come to the end of therapy. I joked that I felt abandoned.

Well ... .  I did! I contacted her and shared that and arranged for one more session. I needed to review where I had been, where I was now and where I am going. She agreed and apologized - she had just come back from surgery and was trying to lighten her load (and she thought i was ready).

So we met yesterday. Her appointment after me had canceled so we had 2 hours to talk. It was really nice - kind of like to people taking a journey together and then talking about it before separating and going our separate ways. A healthy adult way versus the betrayal, willful abandonment and emotional violent ending I had with the ex.

In our talk I was able to list the positives and negatives of the r/s experience. At the end of the day the positives, especially my new awareness of my core issues, outweigh the painful negatives. I believe my Higher Power put this woman in my journey for a reason -  to become more discerning, compassionate and loving, to to grow up. I can be grateful for the r/s even though I still have moments of resentment. I have set my intention to forgive (but probably not forget). It will take time but I have faith that with an attitude of gratitude it will come to pass.

I felt really good about ending the T r/s as an adult. She added that I could call if I needed support and that's reassuring. Jokingly I asked her is she would do assessments on any future r/s candidates. We both had a good laugh and had a long hug. There is a lot of great, fairly normal, loving people out there. That's who I want and need to hang out with.

[nolisan]

About a month ago I saw my T (a great woman social worker from a crisis shelter). This was about 6 months out from the final breakup with the ex.

Near the end she said she thought I was doing great and she felt we had come to the end of therapy. I joked that I felt abandoned.

Well ... .  I did! I contacted her and shared that and arranged for one more session. I needed to review where I had been, where I was now and where I am going. She agreed and apologized - she had just come back from surgery and was trying to lighten her load (and she thought i was ready).

So we met yesterday. Her appointment after me had canceled so we had 2 hours to talk. It was really nice - kind of like to people taking a journey together and then talking about it before separating and going our separate ways. A healthy adult way versus the betrayal, willful abandonment and emotional violent ending I had with the ex.

In our talk I was able to list the positives and negatives of the r/s experience. At the end of the day the positives, especially my new awareness of my core issues, outweigh the painful negatives. I believe my Higher Power put this woman in my journey for a reason -  to become more discerning, compassionate and loving, to to grow up. I can be grateful for the r/s even though I still have moments of resentment. I have set my intention to forgive (but probably not forget). It will take time but I have faith that with an attitude of gratitude it will come to pass.

I felt really good about ending the T r/s as an adult. She added that I could call if I needed support and that's reassuring. Jokingly I asked her is she would do assessments on any future r/s candidates. We both had a good laugh and had a long hug. There is a lot of great, fairly normal, loving people out there. That's who I want and need to hang out with.

[xenia]

There is a lot of great, fairly normal, loving people out there. That's who I want and need to hang out with.

I believe this as well. Just wondering when my journey will bring me to them. Thanks for sharing your experience. I needed to read it.

[GreenMango]

 . That sounds really good.