I've seen several threads on this before, but not a more recent one:
https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=139494.0https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=140450.0https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=81039.0My uBPDw (clinically undiagnosed but shows strong signs) will often refer to herself in the third person during arguments. She hardly ever does this during positive times that I've noticed, but it does happen (e.g., "She likes to try new things for our relationship". But she'll express statements like:
* "She must be seen as so dumb and stupid"
* "She could see things clearly if she wasn't such a stupid hit."
* "She is horrible."
* "She should just shut up and know her place"
* "She is being whipped around at the end of your rope, she sees how you are manipulating her."
* "Educate her, for she is crazy. Feel sorry for me."
* "I asked for space... . he can't give because of his own needs (to be affectionate). What will she do? You crushed my heart."[/li][/list]
On occasion, she's chalked this up to self-pity. And of course I've read about "splitting" and "disassociating", and how this may relate to her projecting her own negative emotions on me. I'm struggling to have a better understanding of why she'd do this, and what I can do during those moments she talks about herself... . like she's outside herself.