A children's book says much

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I have always loved "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein. Have not been able to get this book from my mind. I think it may say something about our BPD partners. The little boy in the story taking and taking and the tree giving and giving. They are bonded in a way. It just made me think of how often we caretakers or people pleasers give and give to our partners until there was nothing left to give.

any thoughts?

[clover528]

I have always loved "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein. Have not been able to get this book from my mind. I think it may say something about our BPD partners. The little boy in the story taking and taking and the tree giving and giving. They are bonded in a way. It just made me think of how often we caretakers or people pleasers give and give to our partners until there was nothing left to give.

any thoughts?

[Jep]

Awww.  You are so right. That book always made me sad in the same way so many of our stories do now. 

[Learning_curve74]

In the end, the tree had nothing left to give reduced to just a stump. It's a scary story to me.  :'(

[Sharkey167]

We need the Lorax! Someone has to speak for the trees! 

[Trick1004]

I never liked that book much, it was read to me plenty of times as a kid. I always felt bad for the tree.

Thanks for pointing this out! 

[tailspin]

I love that story but it can be interpreted several different ways.  I see it as an expression of the tree's unconditional love for the boy similar to the love a mother gives to her child.  The tree gives the boy everything she possibly could and in the end, when she was just a stump for him to sit on, "the tree was happy."

I can see how this story can be disturbing to some as a portrayal of a dysfunctional relationship.  However, this story can also have an environmental or religious meaning depending how one looks at it. 

tailspin

[clover528]

I agree tailspin.

As with many classic stories and novels, much is left to perception and interpretation. Our view and experience shapes what we perceive.

My reference here is to the fact that the tree I agree represents unconditional love. ( The same thing we and our pwBPD craved ).

In the end the tree was happy, yes. but left as a stump having given all to the boy. ( We get our care giving needs met by giving until we have nothing left to give)

The boy kept returning to his supply until he was unable to "do". Hence he needed a seat. ( pwBPD take until there is nothing left to give, because they have a constant need and desire for unconditional love)

This is only my perception of this story with regard to my current situation. What I enjoy about all literature, is the ability to apply most of the worthwhile writings to many aspects of our lives.

Personally, I love this story. It has and will always be a favorite for all the reasons sited. It makes us think about ourselves as much as others.