Classroom wanted picture of family.

[Mutt]

My son is in kindergarten and they wanted to post family photos outside of the classroom on a billboard.

My uBPD ex left 9 months ago. She had started an affair 8 months prior to that. We have D7, S5, S2 together. uBPD ex has had her affair partner staying with her since the 3rd week she left.

She gave the school photos of our kids and her daughter, so 1 single photo of the 4 kids by themselves. She had a photo of her and the affair partner together above that photo, and to the left of the kids photo there was a photo of me. All of it provided by the ex. So this is a representation of my son's family that she provided for his class.

I guess, I'm scratching my head. Do I just throw this in the heap pile that it's something that a uBPD does, it's crazy logic and as a non, it will just make me more crazy in trying to figure out the logic?

The best that I can come up with is that, it's a visual representation of triangulation? She painted me black, left, she's been nothing but controlling, hurtful and entitled since she left, so to even give me a seconds thought, to include me as part of the family is beyond me. It also makes me feel sad that's what she gave for my son for his classroom to see.

Thanks for listening to me rant.

[HarmKrakow]

That's one crazy storm. If I was in your shoes, I would rant 2! No advice, but good you went for the venting.

All I can say, you just sometimes must scratch your head and wonder what drama movie you entered.

[david]

On a positive note, my ex doesn't have a significant other or at least hasn't let it be known to the kids and me. She did do the picture thing at school though. It helps the teachers "get it" and that helps you help the kids. Those little things are very helpful for others to see and figure things out. My ex has no idea what the implications of her actions are in situations like these. It used to really bother me but now I see it in a different light since it has backfired on her. 

I used to entertain sending her a big thank you when are youngest turns 20 something. He is only ten now. I thought it would be great if I had pages of all those kind of things and explained how she alienated people around her including our kids. I came to realize it was a waste of my time thinking such things.

Our boys are 10 and 15 now and they talk to me about everything going on with their mom. Our boys "got it" too even when they were younger. They said nothing then but now they trust me enough to tell me how they felt then. It was embarrassing and sometimes hurtful to them. I listen and validate.

[Mutt]

I guess I needed to vent. I wasn't sure to even ask, if someone else has gone through this? It's just strange/hurtful/exposes what the kids are going through.

I needed to hear this.

My ex has no idea what the implications of her actions are in situations like these.

I had forgotten that she doesn't have a clue. She doesn't get it and she doesn't have the capacity too.

Thank you both for letting me vent and advise that the kids also see things for what they are. People at the school are seeing things for what they are. My son's friends mother had asked me about this and said her husband said that it was nuts.

[Baylor218]

Yo brother, my ex with uBPD recently called me asking if I went in her house.  She said someone went into her house, moved the dog gate so the dog got loose in the house, and then ate a cupcake.  Nothing was missing even though my daughters laptop and camera were on the kitchen counter.  She didn't fully believe it wasn't me and called the police to make a report.  I was waiting for a phone call or visit from the police to see if I was the cupcake burglar.

[Mutt]

Yo brother, my ex with uBPD recently called me asking if I went in her house.  She said someone went into her house, moved the dog gate so the dog got loose in the house, and then ate a cupcake.  Nothing was missing even though my daughters laptop and camera were on the kitchen counter.  She didn't fully believe it wasn't me and called the police to make a report.  I was waiting for a phone call or visit from the police to see if I was the cupcake burglar.

That put a smile on my face brother. Thanks!

[momtara]

that made me laugh, too.  you should have said, "I don't... .mmmm, yum, mmmm, gobble... .know what you're talkinga bout."

I had to submit a family photo too.  Just sent one with all of us from a year ago.  My ex is not with a significant other, and wants to come home.  It's just easier to send a family photo than anything weird.

Hey, at least your ex included you.