Hi everyone,
It’s been over a year since my “emotional affair” with uBPD ended and I have read tons on these boards which help me greatly.
Though I still think about him, I feel an “awareness” of my issues (i.e: codependency…)…and feelings. I see things from childhood having a part, definitely. But I have a ways to go... .
How do you grow from that inner voice that comes around as you’re trying to go to sleep and says:
“Did I say/do anything wrong today?” (Especially after visiting with family (FOO, yep!))
I have young adult children who are doing so well... .but a lot of FOG since I’m in a marriage I don't want (not BPD) and job that’s ridiculous, though I do see ways to strengthen my boundaries while at work. I have my eye on getting out of there, but just missed the deadline to apply for a job I’d like too... so it’s my fault, I see that. I want to feel excited about life, but really don’t.
