Can BPDs be supportive partners after treatment?

[Quantendynamik]

This question pops up when I read MissyM's post "BPD escalates behavior when I am sick?"

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=218821.0

Being in a relationship, I would expect my partner being able to be supportive when I am having a hard time, or to be able to share our feelings with them.

However, with BPD, all those seem impossible, as those will trigger their reaction, and you will have more problems to deal with.

From the readings I accepted that it is not their fault, and there are treatments to help them.

Is it possible that they can be supportive after treatment or just less conflicts and we have to be the only adult in the house all the time (which is just sad)?

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[MissyM]

Q, my understanding is that my dBPDh can learn to be supportive but it will always be something he will have to work at.  Apparently, there are varying degrees of recovery.  I have a good friend that is mostly a recovered BPD and she said she still has the selfish, victim thoughts but can stop it at the thoughts.  Apparently, that is a very good recovery for a BPD. Some even years into recovery can only recognize their behavior and thoughts after they have given into them.

[momtara]

I would like to believe that, but I'm not sure.  My BPD exH wants to get back together in a few years and is in therapy.  But I still see very similar behavior to a year ago.  He takes responsibility for his actions (a big step), but also does vengeful things when triggered.  I still hope that what you ask has a 'yes' answer, but I don't know.