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Beware of Junk Psychology... Just because it's on the Internet doesn't mean it's true. Not all blogs and online "life coaches" are reliable, accurate, or healthy for you. Remember, there is no oversight, no competency testing, no registration, and no accountability for many sites - it is up to you to qualify the resource. Learn how to navigate this complicated arena...
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Author Topic: Was anybody married less than 3 years and got out before it got worse?  (Read 482 times)
michel71
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 535


« on: September 05, 2014, 08:55:43 PM »

Hi folks. I was just wondering if you could share your stories. I have read so many heartbreaking tales of long term marriages ending in complete destruction. My heart goes out to all the poor people that suffered this.

As a plight of the short term marriages, I am guessing that since the idealization phase is so recent, it might be agony of a different kind. If anybody out there, married less than three years could tell their stories, I would be much appreciative.

I am just ending mine and looking for all the emotional strength and encouragement I can get. Thanks!
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Pingo
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: Separated
Posts: 924



« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2014, 11:35:04 PM »

I was married for one year, almost to the day before I asked him to move out.  It was truly the most difficult decision I have ever made.  The 'honeymoon' period before and after our wedding was so amazing but a couple of months later things started to unravel.  I'd like to say that it was the first time I saw this behaviour but I saw it all along after the first year or so (we were together 4 years total) and after almost splitting up a year previous I thought we had worked things out, he had 'seen the light' and was a changed man. It was actually my idea to get married.  So to make the decision to end things with the memory of our beautiful day still so fresh in my memory was heartbreaking.  But I couldn't take the abuse, my anxiety was at an all time high and I was starting to get really scared.  I had a feeling if I didn't get out now it was just going to get harder to leave later.  This is my second marriage and it is really hard knowing I'm going to be a twice-divorced woman at the age of 44.  Not how I imagined my life would turn out, that is for sure.  But I do have hope, I just stated in another thread that I feel like an onion with layers and layers peeling off me right now, exposing some very deep wounds I had been harbouring, not even aware of.  I feel like this is my real chance to heal deeply and find true joy in my life.
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