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Skills we were never taught
98
A 3 Minute Lesson
on Ending Conflict
Communication Skills-
Don't Be Invalidating
Listen with Empathy -
A Powerful Life Skill
Setting Boundaries
and Setting Limits
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Author Topic: HI just wanted to say hi and check in...  (Read 761 times)
Wanda
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: in second marriage for 20 years on valentines day
Posts: 2584



« on: October 06, 2014, 09:38:12 PM »

 

i am still here, i am not on as  much due to i don't see any names i recognize maybe if i come on more then never i would know the names i just came on to say   things here continue to be fine, my husband who has BPD and doesn't know it does well also, right now he still works over nights i work swing shift all our kids have  grown up and two are out. our oldest son who is challenged but high functioning i am working on moving him out also with two other guys who is challenged also. this empty nesting sure is hard. my husband doesn't like change but what BPD does right? so  he is wishy washy about the whole thing.  but things are going fine if i am not on again. Happy Halloween...

we will be married 18 years this valentines day. and for us things got better( a reason i am not on as much )he doesn't rage any more . not for days at a time like he use to, a lot is i just walk away i don't listen to him. i changed and so did he, he has no choice. well just wanted to say hi... .
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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

takingandsending
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Married, 15 years; together 18 years
Posts: 1121



« Reply #1 on: October 07, 2014, 12:06:11 AM »

Hi Wanda. I appreciate hearing your good news very much! I suppose it is just small, incremental changes over the months and years if you can keep doing the work on yourself that makes things better.

Glad to hear you are hanging in there on the functional side of life. I hope to see you on that side someday soon. 
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Rapt Reader
Retired Staff
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: married
Posts: 3626



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« Reply #2 on: October 07, 2014, 11:45:04 AM »

Thanks for checking in with an update, Wanda  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

It's great to hear your news, and wonderful encouragement for the rest of us... .

i changed and so did he, he has no choice.

Exactly 

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Grey Kitty
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Separated
Posts: 7182



« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2014, 06:42:13 PM »

  Glad to hear things are good for you. I'm doing well, and my wife isn't showing the BPD symptoms anymore, 'tho she has had a recent bout with depression and anxiety.
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Lucky One
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 164



« Reply #4 on: October 10, 2014, 07:12:59 AM »

Hi Wanda,

Glad to hear your success story.

I've just started the long road, and find stories like yours, and others like Formflier, truly motivational and inspirational.

Have to work on ourselves - that's the solution - you guys have convinced me!

Good place to start.

Thanks so much Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)
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sweetheart
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married, together 11 years. Not living together since June 2017, but still in a relationship.
Posts: 1235



« Reply #5 on: October 10, 2014, 10:07:36 AM »

Hello Wanda,

Thanku for posting it means a lot to me personally as it's always so lovely to have positive news and that's what I needed today.

I think waverider once said that we naturally tend towards using the site when we are in difficulties or trying to facilitate our own overwhelmed internal process.

I was having a difficult day today, feeling really overwhelmed emotionally. Ironically it was the little things that I was finding so hard to deal with, a really messy kitchen, little or no help arranging activities for our son, juggling domestic life and then navigating that path with a pwBPD.

It didn't last too long, I did a bit of crying in the shower, then took s6 swimming, had a really lovely time.

Wishing you and your family well xxx
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