I still stand by one very simple concept when it comes to my ex and I keep pounding it in my head when I miss her or am trying to stay NC. 'Words do not meet actions', ever. For all her non traditional neediness, professing her love, none of those words met her actions time and time again. It's pretty easy to feel alone in the room with them when that's going on.
So true. Mine's words rarely live up to his actions. I don't know why I didn't see that sooner. Time and time again I would bring up issues and we would talk about them and he would say all of the right things but he rarely follows up with actions. The mixed messages are so confusing. I think that contributes to making it difficult to detach. I know that there was a long period of time that I would hold on to his words and think, "Oh, he knows what he needs to do and he knows what I need. I just have to give him more time. Maybe I am being impatient or too needy." The reality is that I was NOT needy and that I was being too patient.
