My wife had a nervous breakdown? She 'wanted the Lord to take her'

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

My wife and I have been sleeping separately for a few weeks.  Her parents invited us to come over for thanksgiving dinner as they hope we are able to resolve our problems.  My wife did not want to go because she is not getting along with some of them so I went by myself without letting her know.

Her parents house is just a few blocks away.   I thought she would show up later, but she never did.  She called me around 8pm and started yelling at me.  I came home to talk to her and I really did not expect her reaction.  She started yelling as hard as she could.  She was pacing back and forth crying, yelling and sometimes screaming out of desperation.  I am used to hear her arguements, but this was different.  She couldn't breathe.  She went in the bathroom and started screaming and making a sound like an animal was being killed. 

This lasted for hours.  She was yelling that her parents betrayed her and that I abandoned her.  She also said she 'wanted the lord to take her'.   I called her parents over because I was worried about that.  This is the first time she said anything like that.  Eventually she calmed down.  Today she spoke to me and asked me to start divorce proceedings.  I told her I already had started.  I will try to convince her to see a Psychiatrist. We have a daughter and I am worried for them.

[seenoevil]

My wife and I have been sleeping separately for a few weeks.  Her parents invited us to come over for thanksgiving dinner as they hope we are able to resolve our problems.  My wife did not want to go because she is not getting along with some of them so I went by myself without letting her know.

Her parents house is just a few blocks away.   I thought she would show up later, but she never did.  She called me around 8pm and started yelling at me.  I came home to talk to her and I really did not expect her reaction.  She started yelling as hard as she could.  She was pacing back and forth crying, yelling and sometimes screaming out of desperation.  I am used to hear her arguements, but this was different.  She couldn't breathe.  She went in the bathroom and started screaming and making a sound like an animal was being killed. 

This lasted for hours.  She was yelling that her parents betrayed her and that I abandoned her.  She also said she 'wanted the lord to take her'.   I called her parents over because I was worried about that.  This is the first time she said anything like that.  Eventually she calmed down.  Today she spoke to me and asked me to start divorce proceedings.  I told her I already had started.  I will try to convince her to see a Psychiatrist. We have a daughter and I am worried for them.

[peiper]

You have no choice except to take care of your daughter and yourself. Maybe she'll get help or maybe not. Your girl doesn't need to be exposed to this behavior.  Good luck and I'm sorry your going through this.

[Turkish]

I'm sorry that you and your family are dealing with this, especially on Thanksgiving. 

You did what you thought was right for you, yet she still turned it towards herself. This sounds similar to two incidents which happened with me. She was depressed, went to lie down. I was mad that the day was being wasted, so I took our baby and went to get groceries. I came home to an empty house, a nasty and vulgar note,.and pieces of her cell phone scattered down the hallway.

A few Christmases ago, we were hanging out with her family. She and her mom started arguing. She stormed out without me and our baby. I stayed. A little while later, I got an angry text, BRING MY BABY HOME NOW!

I arrived home to find her curled up in a fetal position on the bathroom floor, utterly despondent. She had left what all but sounded like a suicide note on the computer. Merry Christmas.

Without judging what we did right or wrong, and maybe there is no right answer, we abandoned them in their minds.